Category: Semen Retention

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Raw-Dogging Reality – Recovering Your Dopamine, Pt. 2

Meditation

Meditation is a great way to see firsthand your mind’s addiction to empty stimulation. You sit down, close your eyes, and attempt to keep your mind focused on just one thing, such as the breath. Sounds boring right? It certainly was for me at first and it is for most newcomers, who find that their mind will do anything in its power to find something more interesting. 

Daydreams and distractions abound! 

Stick with it though, and slowly but surely the mind will begin to settle, and peace, even bliss can begin to arise. Further, it strengthens your mind’s ability to focus and stay on task, “sharpening the saw” so to speak, so that you can accomplish your goals that much more easily.

In short, meditation is the exact opposite of our attention-scattered, distracted, empty stimulation-seeking habits, and is a big part of the antidote. Our minds drive us from distraction to distraction; meditation says “no” to all of these distractions and teaches the mind to settle on just one thing.

The things we’re giving up this month are a prime example of how the mind craves distraction and stimulation. We aren’t content to just be, but instead run from distraction to distraction, from empty dopamine hit to dopamine hit, hoping to achieve some lasting satisfaction. 

But these things never bring lasting satisfaction, do they? If they did, we wouldn’t get bored so fast and look for something else to fill that hole within us. If they did, that Christmas gift we wanted so badly when we were 10 would still be bringing us great satisfaction, but the satisfaction faded pretty quickly. Come to think of it, the satisfaction we get from anything fades pretty quickly, doesn’t it?

Meditation is the antithesis to our mind constantly running around seeking stimulation – you bring it back, again and again and again, to the object of meditation. And as the mind settles and lets go of its craving, peace and bliss may start to arise. 

What might cause these good feelings? The joy you experience when you get something that you really wanted isn’t actually coming from that object – it’s coming from the craving for that object going away. Think about it, there is nothing inherently joy-producing from a nice juicy steak – if there was, you’d be fine eating it for every meal of the day for the rest of eternity, but anyone would get sick of that pretty quick.

The joy you experience when you get something you were really craving comes from the craving going away – and the amount of joy is proportional to the amount of craving that has ceased.

When the mind lets go of craving, it experiences peace and bliss. This is what meditation can provide, a temporary reprieve from craving, on demand. Meditation teaches you to find contentment and peace in the present moment, so that you aren’t reliant upon outer sources of happiness.

But it takes practice and commitment.

If you aren’t meditating yet, try it out this month. 5 minutes in the evening the first week, 10 the next week, 15 on week three, and 20 mins each night on week four.

Basic Meditation on the Breath

  1. Sit in a comfortable position in a quiet room, and take 3-5 deep belly breaths to settle down. Set a timer for 5-20 mins.
  2. Focus on the sensations of the breath at the tip of the nostrils – this will be your object of meditation. Don’t alter your breath in any way, just passively notice the sensations.
  3. Begin to count your breaths, with one in-breath and one out-breath being one breath. So breathe in, feeling the sensations at the tip of the nose, breathe out feeling those same sensations, and mentally note “one”. Count up to five or ten, then repeat.
  4. Conversely, you can note “in” on the in-breath, and “out” on the out-breath.
  5. When your mind wanders, and it will, gently bring your attention back to the sensations of the breath at the tip of the nose. Do this for the entire length of the session, and each time the mind wanders and you bring it back, think of it as “reps” for your mind muscles.
  6. If after a while, when mind wandering has been significantly reduced, drop the mental noting and try to stay with just the sensations of the breath. Try to be aware of every moment of sensation on the in-breath, be aware of the lack of sensation in between breaths, and then be aware of every sensation of the out-breath. This is more subtle and thus more difficult.
  7. When the timer goes off, congratulate yourself. Generate positive feelings, because you just did something Kingly – you took control and overcame the urge to distract yourself. 
  8. Your mind needs to be balanced between the gentle effort of concentrating on the breath with a relaxed “letting go” of other thoughts and sensations. Just as a guitar string that is too tight or too loose won’t sound right, so too must your mind be balanced between gentle effort and relaxation.

Supplements to Enhance Dopamine

There are supplements/drugs that release dopamine on their own, called agonists, that you mainly want to avoid right now. They cause your brain to release large amounts of dopamine all at once, which feels great, but basically ruins your inherent dopamine sensitivity and production over time, leading to depression, the blahs, anhedonia, lethargy, etc etc. So for the purpose of this month-long experiment, avoid dopamine agonists like nicotine, beer, Mary Jane and drugs like (do I even need to say this?) cocaine, adderall and other ADHD meds, MDMA, opiates, kratom, etc. If you are prescribed any of these, it’s best to stick with your prescription and discuss it with your doctor if you want to get off of them.

Coffee, tea and caffeine get a pass as they actually help keep dopamine receptors sensitive, but keep the intake on the lower side – aim for reducing down to 50 to 200 mg per day tops, over a week or two.

Then there are supplements that enhance your body’s own production of dopamine, called precursors. These supply your brain with the raw material to synthesize dopamine, but almost all of them have a “rate-limiting factor”, which means the brain won’t get overloaded with dopamine and you won’t deal with decreases in natural production and loss of sensitivity. 

Certain compounds are great at protecting dopaminergic neurons from toxicity from too much dopamine, aka our usual quick fixes, be it lighter things like gaming/social media or harder things like occasional drug use. These are great options to have on hand or take daily.

Finally, there are supplements that can help resensitize your neurons to dopamine – meaning however much dopamine your brain naturally releases will be better utilized. In other words, you go further with less. 

All of these options are fantastic for us because once we give up our crutches, our quick fixes, our brains will be without their usual sources of quick dopamine hits, meaning we will likely be feeling pretty “blah”. Dopamine precursors will give us an immediate boost in energy and motivation, and dopamine re-sensitization agents will help us over the long term to go further with the dopamine our brains are naturally releasing from everyday life.

Dopamine precursors – must be taken on an empty stomach for full effectiveness. Pick one or two to try out, and use 1-2 times daily or keep them for when you’re really dragging ass. Don’t use a bunch at the same time! We’re just looking for a little dopaminergic boost if we need it.

  • L-Tyrosine – converts to L-DOPA which converts to dopamine. This and NALT are probably the strongest in terms of acute effects.
  • N-Acetyl L-Tyrosine (NALT) – This is more potent than plain L-Tyrosine, but I actually prefer plain Tyrosine. Many prefer NALT, so take your pick. Lots of discussion on comparisons of the two on r/nootropics.
  • L-Phenylalanine – converts to L-Tyrosine, then L-DOPA, then dopamine. It’s a bit less effective than L-Tyrosine
  • DL-Phenylalanine (DLPA) – L-Phenyl converts to L-Tyrosine like before, but the D-Phenyl blocks the enzyme in the body that breaks down endorphins, giving you a nice pain-killing, warm fuzzy feeling – you won’t get high, but it really softens the edges of going without your dopaminergic crutches. This is what I’ve been using, as it provides a very nice but subtle glow while my brain readjusts to giving up its dopamine depletors. A bit “softer” than L-Ty or NALT, but has the endorphin glow.
  • Cordyceps – another great pick that works in a different manner. This is an amazing jing- and qi-boosting mushroom from the orient that increases tyrosine-hydroxylase, the enzyme that converts L-Tyrosine to L-DOPA. From the linked study, “These results suggest that CME (a cordyceps extract) can upregulate the dopaminergic (DArgic) system, and may contribute to neuroprotection in neurodegenerative diseases.” I have been using Nootropic Depot’s 10:1 Cordyceps extract, and I love it.

Dopamine neuroprotectants – these won’t do much for our little month long experiment, and you likely won’t notice any “boost” when you take them, but they’re great to get in the habit of using daily to protect your dopamine neurons, or especially to use before you’re going to do anything that hammers the dopamine system – drinking, taking prescription ADHD meds, etc.

  • PQQ – Similar to CoQ10, PQQ is neuroprotective to dopaminergic neurons, is a powerful antioxidant and not only energizes existing mitochondria (the engines of your cells), but even creates new mitochondria, giving you more day to day energy- in other words, it boosts qi/prana. No need to cycle but it can be on the pricier side, and oftentimes you’ll find it paired with CoQ10. I’d do a 2-3 month cycles of it to get the mitochondrial benefits, or simply keep it on hand if you know you’re going to be indulging in anything that overloads the dopamine system. Here it is with CoQ10, here it is by itself.
  • Gynostemma – a classic adaptogen hailing from Traditional Chinese Medicine, this qi-boosting herb is also neuroprotective and “neuro-restorative” to dopaminergic neurons. Also delays fatigue, improves insulin sensitivity and a whole lot more. It’s pretty affordable – I have 1-2 cups per day of this tea, which also has extracts of schisandra, goji berry, astragalus and siberian ginseng. This combo is also available in tincture form, or you can try loose gynostemma by itself. Here is an organic source but it will cost a bit more. Also I have not tried these specific loose teas so feel free to source your own.

Dopamine resensitizing agents – these are the real gold here, as they help our neurons to actually recuperate and repair, making them more sensitive to the dopamine our brains naturally produce. While some do gently increase the amount of dopamine in the brain, the big benefit is that they make what dopamine is released more effective – but you need to take them consistently over a longer period of time to get these effects. Try one out for a few months at least, or better yet, use one for 2-3 months, then use a different one, etc, keeping those dopamine receptors fresh.

  • Sulbutiamine – a fat-soluble form of vitamin B1 that modulates dopaminergic systems in the brain. It actually decreases dopamine in D2 receptors, which, over the long haul, increases their expression and sensitivity. For most, it provides a pretty palpable energy boost the first 5-10 times using it, then seems to not do much for energy, but it still is working in the background on those D2 receptors. My top pick if you regularly consume alcohol, as alcohol massively depletes vitamin B1. 
  • Uridine – a dopamine neuromodulator, uridine can increase dopamines effectiveness. Use uridine monophosphate or its more bioavailable form, triacetyluridine. It has even more potent restorative effects when combined with the omega-3 fatty acid, DHA, which you can buy in an already combined form here – highly recommended.
  • Forskolin – robustly upregulates dopamine D2 receptors and “receptor supersensitivity” via increasing cAMP, which has other benefits, possibly increasing testosterone as well. 
  • Acetyl-l-carnitine – also known as ALCAR, this acetylated amino acid increases expression of dopamine D1 receptors – all the others affect D2. It’s also neuroprotective, boosts energy and helps shuttle fat into mitochondria to be burned as fuel. You’ll probably feel it’s energy boosting effects, and can get powder here (it’s sour but manageable), or pills here.

Just Be

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” – Blaise Pascal

I write about this practice in the book I’ve been working on (just need to format it at this point), that of practicing just being. It isn’t a cutting-edge tool or technique, but rather a test of sorts to see how far we’ve come in terms of giving up our pointless dopamine depletors. 

Just sit down on a park bench, your front porch, the end of your bed or on your couch. Put your phone on airplane mode and set a timer for 10 minutes. Don’t drink coffee, tea or a beer, don’t smoke a cigarette or a joint. 

Just sit there and be. 

Don’t meditate, don’t try to problem solve, don’t pray, don’t repeat a mantra, don’t do anything at all. Thoughts will come up, but try to remain a passive observer of them.

How antsy are you? How badly do you want to check your phone? How excruciating is it to just sit there calmly? 

Isn’t it ironic we call ourselves human beings when 99% of us find it painful to just sit and be?

What you’re experiencing first hand is craving and aversion in the mind. Craving to do something else, something more stimulating. Aversion to just being, aversion to plain old reality as it is.

Do this once or twice a week this month. You should find that by the end of the month, it’s not so bad to just sit there. Hell, it may even be pleasant. It’s a great litmus test to see how far you’ve come in terms of seeking empty stimulation.

“When we scratch the wound and give into our addictions, we do not allow the wound to heal. But when we instead experience the raw quality of the itch or pain of the wound and do not scratch it, we actually allow the wound to heal.” – Pema Chodron

Putting it all Together

So how do we put this all together? The first part is cutting out dopamine depletors, or at least greatly reducing them. I recommend taking an inventory and seeing what activities you regularly engage in that are sources of empty pleasure, and then systematically give them up.

You should cut out drugs and alcohol entirely this month. If you’re addicted to anything beyond caffeine, that goes beyond the scope of this little experiment, so get help with that first. I’m not getting into the debate on whether caffeine should be used or not while practicing semen retention – it works fine for some and causes relapses for others. I will say that if you’re a heavy caffeine user, try tapering down by 50 mg or so each week. 

Embrace boredom – you may find it leads to creativity. Don’t whip your phone out while you’re waiting in line at the store or while going to the bathroom. Don’t start texting your boys when the book you’re reading bores you. Try driving, lifting and running sometimes without music.

I want you to be raw-dogging reality! Yes, it will be boring at first. Be a man, suck it up, and persevere. It will get better as time goes on.

At the same time as you cut out your dopamine wasters, actively embrace discomfort, both the small things like chores, homework, reading, journaling, meditating, and the big things, like exercise, fasting, sauna use and/or cold showers. Create nightly lists, accomplish what’s on them first thing in the morning.

Remember, exercise, fasting, sauna use and cold showers not only toughen up the mind, but give you a big boost in terms of neurotransmitters, such as dopamine, epinephrine, serotonin and endorphins. These hormetic stressors will provide an immediate and sustainable release of dopamine, as well as speed up the recovery process. They will make your life much less “blah” and much more rewarding.

Recall that meditation is the antithesis to the constant stimulation-seeking, craving aspect of the mind. It would do you well to make it a daily habit, even if it’s just 5 to 10 minutes each day.

Get yourself a supplement that naturally increases dopamine in a natural, controlled manner, as your brain will be in a dopamine deficit after cutting out those timewasters. Bonus points if you get a supplement that helps resensitize your dopamine receptors.

As your brain resensitizes and your hedonic setpoint gets raised, the small things will gradually become more and more interesting and pleasurable. 

What you do after this experiment is, of course, your choice. If you choose to keep going, realize you’ll need to constantly be putting effort into this. Remember, we’re drowning in a world of hyperstimulating things – to push away or limit phone time, screen time, game time, drugs, junk food, and especially porn requires constant effort and vigilance. 

Entropy is always working against us, boys.

You will be greatly rewarded, however, as you will no longer be a slave to your mind’s craving for constant stimulation. You will be in control. You will be a King amongst the peasants. You will tell your mind what to focus on, and it will listen. And after a few days to weeks to months, you will find accomplishing tasks and goals rewarding. You will look down sympathetically at everyone else, watching as they run towards the next empty dopamine hit, leaving behind their real dreams and goals.

You’ll need to figure out to what degree you let these vices back into your life. Some things you may want to cut out entirely, such as endless scrolling on social media, drinking alcohol, or smoking cigarettes or weed.

Or you may decide that if you had a good, productive week, a couple beers with the boys on the weekend is no big deal, or enjoying a well-rolled spliff as you game for a few hours Sunday night is no big deal. 

Whatever you decide, be sure to keep constant vigilance and to push on the pain side of the balance. Make sure that you are the one in control, not the constant craving for empty stimulation. 

“It matters not how strait the gate,

      How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate,

      I am the captain of my soul.” Invictus, William Ernest Henley

Further Resources 

Dr. Anna Lembke’s book Dopamine Nation, and the Huberman Lab Podcast episode with Lembke titled Understanding and Treating Addiction, for understanding dopamine more and leveraging the “pleasure/pain balance”

James Clear’s Atomic Habits to learn best practices for creating new habits that stick and breaking old counter-productive habits

A Mind Without Craving – An excellent book by Delson Armstrong

The Craving Mind: From Cigarettes to Smartphones to Love – Why We Get Hooked and How We Can Break Bad Habits – By Judson Brewer

David Goggins on the Joe Rogan Experience, episode 1080 and episode 1906, for toughening up and general bad-assery

Jocko Willink on the JRE – “Don’t worry about motivation. Motivation is fickle. It comes and goes. It is unreliable – and when you are counting on motivation to get your goals accomplished, you will likely fall short. Don’t count on motivation; count on discipline.” – Jocko Willink 

Conquering Flatlines/PAWS, a previous post – similar info but not necessary reading

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Raw-Dogging Reality – Recovering Your Dopamine, Pt. 1

One of the biggest benefits we get from semen retention is the huge increase in dopamine that occurs when we refrain from orgasm. Dopamine is the molecule that not only gives us the energy, confidence and motivation to get things done, but it’s also the molecule of reward, making us feel good when we accomplish our tasks and goals. 

Of course, it’s also responsible for the good feelings we get from food, drugs, sex, gaming, social media – pretty much anything pleasurable.

Unfortunately, the modern world is filled to the brim with cheap thrills, quick fixes and shiny distractions that constantly drain us of our motivation/reward molecule, and I don’t mean just porn – social media, gaming, binge watching Netflix, even text and email alerts all take us out of the present moment, sapping attention and depleting dopamine.

This leaves us crippled, crabby, maybe even downright useless without our normal crutches. 

In other words – we have become so hooked on chemical highs and technological distractions that bare reality has become unbearable. If we take a month or two to get rid of these chemicals and technological distractions (or at least greatly reduce them), then we will, with no further effort, become happier and more interested in the world around us.

Perhaps more importantly, we will find ourselves with both the energy and the motivation to go out there and chase after the things we really want – our dreams, our goals, our mission.

This post is about combating the modern world and all its cheap pitfalls in order to further enhance the benefits we get from abstaining from PMO, first by cutting out those addictive dopamine depletors; by learning to leverage “the suck” to further enhance the dopaminergic pathways and reward centers in the brain; and using targeted supplements to improve the functioning of dopamine within the brain. It’s similar to a “dopamine detox”, but geared towards retainers with some specific exercises and additional goodies.

Further, unlike most of my posts, there’s very little to do with transmuting sexual energy, yoga, and the esoteric. Just plain, hard science on enhancing dopamine – although this concept is essentially the same as tapas, or spiritual austerity.

This article is written with New Year in mind, and framed within a one month context. Try out what is suggested for the month of January, or any month for that matter, but realize that these are practices you should learn to adopt in your daily life, not just one month out of the year.

And let me be very transparent – I am writing this and engaging in this experiment as a kick in my own pants. I’ve gotten a little soft around the edges the last couple of months in some ways – time to get back to the grindstone.

“Resistance is the grindstone of our soul.” – Aubrey Marcus

“Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” – Warren Buffett

Article at a glance :

  1. Dopamine is the neurochemical currency of drive, motivation and reward. One of the biggest benefits of semen retention is how it quickly and robustly increases dopamine levels – this article is all about further optimizing our lifestyle to maximize dopaminergic function. 
  2. We are addicted to chasing empty stimulation (porn, junk food, social media, gaming, binge watching shows, texts/emails, drugs), and this addiction to distraction and empty stimulation prevents us from doing and enjoying those things we know we need to be doing.
  3. If we give up these meaningless distractions, we allow our brains, specifically our dopamine receptors, time to recuperate and resensitize, making our normal, daily life more enjoyable. We will also reclaim the motivation to accomplish all of our goals, big and small, that we have allowed these devilish distractions to take from us.
  4. Taking this one step further, if we actively “embrace the suck”, we can speed up this process of healing and boost levels of feel good neurotransmitters (Part 1 ends here)
  5. Meditation is the polar opposite of constant stimulation seeking – engaging in focused meditation practice retrains the mind to focus attention and calm down, instead of scattering attention in an agitated manner.
  6. We can use targeted supplementation to increase dopamine levels, protect dopamine neurons, and even to regain neuronal sensitivity to dopamine.
  7. We can assess our progress not only by seeing how much more enjoyment we get out of the real world, but by practicing “just being”.

Dopamine Zombies

The way we achieve things in this life is largely due to dopamine, a neurotransmitter involved in both motivation (the pursuit of our goals and interests), and the feelings of reward after we get or accomplish what we were after. One of the reasons semen retention is so powerful is because of how it’s able to increase dopamine levels so robustly – recall that orgasm leads to a rise in prolactin, which subsequently plummets dopamine levels for up to two weeks afterwards. No orgasm means little prolactin, which means more dopamine, leading to you having the energy, drive and confidence to chase after your goals and accomplish them.

The problem with today’s world is that everything, not just porn, has been designed to hijack the reward pathways in our brains – from food, to video games, to social media, to tv and movies, even to our phones, and nevermind drugs themselves.

Think back to when we were a tribal species. We evolved to get rewarded by “dopamine hits” from finding food, hunting prey, sleeping with actual mates, socializing with real friends and family in person, hearing stories and myths told by elders of the tribe (or by telling them), building and maintaining a living space, dancing and communing around the fire… In other words, we had to work for these rewards, and these rewards were useful and beneficial, ensuring we would do the things we needed to survive and form social bonds. And when we were hunter gatherers, there were essentially zero drugs.

Nowadays? We flip open our phone and have instant access to porn, distracting games, and endless scrolling on social media – which is designed to be addictive. Even texting “creates a dopamine loop” in the brain. We have access to drugs and booze that cause an immediate release of pleasure far beyond anything else in the natural world. We eat food and drink beverages that companies have spent millions of dollars designing to be as rewarding and addicting as possible. 

Just take a look at this chart which shows the massive release of dopamine from some drugs – 

“In today’s dopamine-rich ecosystem, we’ve all become primed for immediate gratification. We want to buy something, and the next day it shows up on our doorstep. We want to know something, and the next second the answer appears on our screen. Are we losing the knack of puzzling things out, or being frustrated while we search for the answer, or having to wait for the things we want? The neuroscientist Samuel McClure and his colleagues examined what parts of the brain are involved in choosing immediate versus delayed rewards. They found that when participants chose immediate rewards, emotion- and reward-processing parts of the brain lit up. When participants delayed their reward, the prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain involved in planning and abstract thinking—became active.

The implication here is that we are all now vulnerable to prefrontal cortical atrophy as our reward pathway has become the dominant driver of our lives.”  Dr. Anna Lembke, Dopamine Nation

And that’s real bad news, because it means we are no longer in control of our behavior. We’re no longer using our prefrontal cortex, that part of the brain so highly developed in humans that allows us to think and plan, but are slaves to our hijacked reward pathways, switching from one source of empty stimulation to the next, not getting anything worthwhile done, not chasing after our dreams or accomplishing our goals.

We’ve become dopamine zombies, slaves to our technology and chemical crutches.

How do we overcome this issue? By getting rid of our addictive substances and timewasters, and actively engaging in the beneficial but less stimulating things we know we should be doing.

“Remember and remind yourself of a phrase favored by Epictetus: ‘persist and resist.’ Persist in your efforts. Resist giving in to distraction, discouragement, or disorder.” – Ryan Holiday

Get rid of Distraction, Lean into Discomfort and Do the Hard Thing (Weaning and Leaning)

The way we get from lazy and comfortable to action-oriented and badass? We need to wean ourselves off of our comfortable, dopaminergic distractions, and lean into those things that are tough that we know we need to be doing. It’s a simple concept, but it can be difficult to really put into place effectively.

I don’t need to tell you what your time wasters are, I’m sure you know them well. Time to start weaning yourself off of them. The most effective method is to just cut them out entirely – no scrolling on any social media apps, no Youtube, no Netflix or gaming. No distracting yourself at all – I want you to be raw-dogging reality. It’s a shock to the system, but it’s effective and there’s no wiggle room to cheat.

If you can’t imagine giving everything up, at least cut out the biggest ones, and save the smaller ones for an hour in the evening the first week, 45 minutes the second week, 30 minutes the 3rd week, cut out completely the last week.

As for drugs? Many in this community don’t use any at all, including caffeine. For those that do, try to cut them out entirely for this month – no booze, no nicotine, no adderall, no pills, no kratom, none of that. I’ll make an exception for caffeine as it’s pretty mild and actually helps to increase dopamine receptor expression, but don’t be pounding energy drinks every two hours.

If your only chemical vice is a bit of coffee each day, cut back on the amount the first couple weeks and then abstain completely the second half of the month, or the last week.

If this is too painful for you, well… Toughen the hell up, buttercup. You want to become a semen retention badass but can’t wait till the evening to engage in your time wasters? Dig deep, get in touch with your manly side, and make it happen!

After you’ve cut your dopamine depletors out or reduced them and moved them to the evening, you’ll have some free time on your hands. Now comes the leaning into part of the practice. What is it you know you should be doing, but that brings up some internal resistance to doing it? Whatever that is, do that thing right now! 

That feeling of resistance should be your cue that whatever is causing said feeling is your new mission. “The Obstacle is the Way”, as Ryan Holiday titled his book on stoicism. That feeling of resistance is your call to arms, the rallying cry to go make things happen. Anyone who does cold showers knows this feeling well. Anyone who has tried to talk to that cute gal over there knows this feeling well. Shit, anyone who has tried to clean their room is familiar with this feeling.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it? The second you feel that feeling, go do that thing without even thinking about it. You don’t have your time wasters to distract you, so what else is there to do?

Just take a second and imagine how different your life would be if, starting today, you didn’t shirk from the essential-but-uncomfortable, but instead attacked head on. Think of how much you could get done today… Think about how much you could get done in a month… Now, imagine if you have been doing things this way for years! 

Yeah, it’s safe to say your life would be very different and undoubtedly much better. You’d scoff at the notion of constantly suckling on the teet of whatever your vices currently are.

Make a list each night before bed of the top 3-5 things you need to get done the next day. Don’t wait until the morning to make the list, have that bad boy ready to go. Then, each time you accomplish a task, cross it off the list. Making the physical list and crossing it off is key to this process. Each time you complete a goal and cross it off the list, guess what? Instant dopamine release – you feel a sense of accomplishment at completing the task (plus some relief thrown in for good measure), and that dopamine release gives you energy and motivation to accomplish the next task. 

It’s a vicious cycle of productive badassery.

Now, you can approach your productive mornings in two different ways. One way is “worst first” – you start your day doing the thing that is gonna be the biggest pain in your ass. With that out of the way, the rest of your manly duties seem much easier. If you’re one of those “fire in the belly” guys, this method may be for you.

I am many things, but a hard-charging, Type A personality I am not. I prefer to start with the smaller things and move up the ladder. The disadvantage here is things become progressively more difficult as I cross off my to-dos, but the upside is I get some small, easy wins which help me build momentum to tackle The Big Baddies. However, both energy and will-power are finite resources, so you have to be strategic about this method. Don’t drain yourself accomplishing 6 smaller tasks and then have no energy to do that 1 big thing you really needed to get done that day – I’ve done that more than I care to admit.

No matter which method you choose, and neither is better than the other, you are now setting yourself up for success in life by training your brain to get dopamine from accomplishing goals, instead of from mindless time wasters or using substances.

Now, it must be noted that in the beginning, the dopamine released from accomplishing small tasks or goals won’t be nearly as big as that released from things like gaming, social media, nicotine, booze, marijuana, etc, etc. If it were, pretty much everyone would easily accomplish their goals off the bat. Hang in there, it will get better.

And it should be noted that the more you allow yourself to spend time on these other highly addictive time wasters, well… The less enjoyment you’ll get out of doing the things you know you need to be doing.

At the risk of repeating myself too often, moving your time wasters to the end of the day and limiting the amount spent on them is a great beginning strategy, but if you really want to get the most out of this month, you should cut them out completely. If you don’t think you can give them up completely from the get-go, start by saving the time wasters for an hour in the evening the first week, a half hour in the second, and then give them up entirely the last two weeks.

This will give your brain time to literally rewire itself – in the wake of blasting your dopamine receptors 24/7 from highly stimulating bullshit, they will re-sensitize enough so that you actually come to enjoy not just adulting, but all the other badass stuff you really want and need to be doing.

And once you reach that point, this won’t be a struggle, it’ll be your new way of life.

“Every conquering temptation represents a new fund of moral energy. Every trial endured and weathered in the right spirit makes a soul nobler and stronger than it was before.” WB Yeats

Pressing on the Pain Side

What if I told you I regularly engaged in a grueling practice that was difficult, increased bodily inflammation, caused oxidative stress, left me sore for days, increased blood pressure and heart rate during the activity, increased metabolic waste products, was toxic to muscle cells and even caused tears in my muscles themselves? 

Other times I deprive my body of nutrients and fuel for extended periods. Sometimes I force myself to endure bouts of extreme heat, while other times I suffer through periods of immersing myself in intensely cold water.

What if I told you that all of the above practices, while harmful in the short term, actually not only improve my health over time, but also raise my hedonic set point, meaning I’m happier at baseline?

As I’m sure you’ve figured out, I was talking about exercise, fasting, deliberate hyperthermia and cold exposure. These are practices that cause acute stress that leads to an increase in overall robustness, which is great for physical health. Something that is often overlooked is that these things are also powerful means to improve your mood, motivation, and energy levels. 

Your hedonic setpoint is essentially your base level of happiness. Some people just seem to be constantly happy, and the rest of us can’t stand those people. Other people are perpetual curmudgeons, the pessimistic Scrooges of the world. The happier you are, the higher your hedonic setpoint, meaning you walk around feeling pretty good the majority of the time. The grumpier you are, the lower your setpoint – you gotta get lots of things going right for you to start feeling good about your life.

Your hedonic setpoint is somewhat malleable – take addiction for example. You take your Average Joe with a normal life who derives pleasure from a multitude of different things – socializing, his dog, his hobbies, and if he’s lucky, maybe even his job. Then you get him hooked on drugs, let’s say cocaine. Cocaine releases so much dopamine that Average Joe gets high as a kite, and so he buys more the next weekend, and more the next weekend.

From The Oatmeal

After a while the only thing bringing him any pleasure is cocaine, and a bit further down the road, even cocaine won’t bring Average Joe any pleasure but will only delay the withdrawals. Compared to the massive surge of dopamine released from cocaine, everything else seems boring in comparison.

Ol Joey has succeeded in making his hedonic setpoint so very low that it doesn’t matter what he does – he can’t experience pleasure. The good news is that after enough sobriety, he can raise his setpoint back up to something close to what it was before his addiction.

We may not be cocaine addicts, but we are addicted to all these other little dopamine wasters – social media, gaming, binging on Netflix, eating takeout chinese food, etc. And the cumulative effect of all these smaller things is very similar to if we’d become addicted to a drug – we become less happy at baseline and are constantly bouncing from one source of empty stimulation to the next, never feeling happy on our own, never satisfied, and rarely doing anything worthwhile.

Now, and this is key, the reverse of this is also true. Put yourself through deliberate exposure to discomfort, and you’ll begin to raise your hedonic setpoint, meaning you get more and more pleasure out of your day to day life.

Imagine you found yourself bedridden in a hospital for a month, and for the sake of argument, let’s just pretend the food was bland and you had no access to friends, family, phones, tvs, games, even books. Just you, your mind, those fluorescent lights and that eggshell-white wall over there. 

Sounds awful, right? 

Now imagine how great it would be once you made it out of that hospital, back into your normal life. The same old food you used to eat would taste amazing, you’d be stoked to interact with your friends again, and of course, it’d be great getting back to your hobbies and toys.

The good news is that we don’t have to be bedridden in a dystopian hospital in order to make our normal life more enjoyable – we just have to cut out the sources of empty stimulation and, simultaneously, actively and systematically embrace what is uncomfortable.

In other words, we have to embrace the suck.

I know, I just told you to give up on your comforting-but-draining timewasters, and now I’m telling you to make things worse by actively seeking out the uncomfortable… But just stick with me here.

Exercise increases all of our feel-good neurotransmitters, including dopamine, norepinephrine and serotonin, as well as endocannabinoids and endorphins; cold immersion causes a huge and long-lasting rise in dopamine and norepinephrine, giving us energy and motivation; sauna use releases dynorphin, a chemical that makes us feel acute discomfort but actually resensitizes the brain to its own endorphins; and fasting increases dopamine, as well as serotonin and norepinephrine.

By pressing hard on the side of pain and discomfort, we are rewarded with an immediate rebound of pleasure. When we give up our addictions and plow headfirst into accomplishing our everyday tasks, we don’t get quite the same immediate reward, but the two combined over time allows us to raise our hedonic setpoint. 

That means you will be happier each and every day, whether things are going your way or not.

So if you give up your junk timewasters, it might hurt today. It might be boring tomorrow. It may feel like a sludge through the doldrums for the next week or two. But by golly, stick with it, because in 2 weeks, you’ll start enjoying the little things in life again, and in 4-8 weeks, you’ll find yourself feeling happy for no damn reason most days. And this process will be sped up if you’re able to actively push on the pain side with these more concentrated practices, specifically exercise, fasting, and cold/heat exposure.

Giving up on our cheap, empty addictions is the road to recovery; actively embracing the uncomfortable makes that road a whole lot easier and shorter.

Check out Part 2 here

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Lessons Learned From Two Months of Sex W/o Ejaculation

A little over two months ago I was lucky enough to meet a girl who was 100% on board with the whole tantric/karreza/sex without release bit. While I’d had these experiences in the past, they were few and far between, and I’d certainly never had a partner who was committed to helping me with this stuff. I figured I’d take some time off from posting and take a deep dive into the world of sex with Semen Retention.

This isn’t so much a guide or how-to style of post – I just wanted to share my experience and thoughts with the fam as well as explain my leave of absence. For any of the guys out there who are booed up and still want to practice Semen Retention – this post should be of great help.

Finding the right woman is PARAMOUNT

This is easily the most important aspect of the whole tantric sex/sex without release game. While you can meet a girl, have sex with her and (hopefully!) just not orgasm, she’s gonna think she’s either ugly, terrible in bed, something is busted with your junk or all of the above. If you explain things to her before doing the deed, at best she’ll think you’re weird, at worst she’ll call things off.

Finding the right woman goes beyond just open communication. My last serious long term relationship was not on board with me not orgasming. She said it made her feel insecure, like she wasn’t good in bed and like I didn’t enjoy myself. It was also very satisfying for her when I got off. Fair enough. No matter how much I tried to explain things to her, she was set in her ways, and honestly if a girl said she was never going to orgasm when we had sex, I’d probably feel like a failure too.

The right woman has to be patient. She has to have an evolved view of sex. Sex can no longer just be about bumpin’ uglies till a huge explosion of body fluids and expletives occurs. It becomes a long-term game, a means of stoking each other’s fires to ever higher and higher heights. Sex is no longer about just getting each other off, but a means of building up more and more energy and friction within the nervous system – with the occasional release, if your hedonic calendaring calls for it.

Communication is JUST as important

Obviously this practice is doomed from the get go if communication is not a top priority. In all likelihood the gal will have never heard of such a practice and be utterly confused. Unless you have a new age-y, hippy dippy granola type on your hands, I’d recommend just showing them the relationship between prolactin and dopamine, explaining how high prolactin and low dopamine turns you into a tame little puppy, not the savage go-getter you truly want to be. That alone should be enough to convince her of the benefits of this practice.

On top of that, she gets to play around with a partner who is looking for e x t e n d e d bouts of sex. Let’s face it fellas – most of us reach climax embarrassingly quickly, which leaves her feeling unsatisfied to say the least. She now has a partner committed to not only lasting a long time in bed, but of putting her sexual needs before his own! Sex without ejaculation is powerful for a man; sex without ejaculation where the woman orgasms is even more powerful.

“For men, frequent intercourse with infrequent ejaculation is the key technique for cultivating sexual essence and energy. Furthermore, retaining semen during intercourse enables a man to not only preserve and reabsorb his own essence, it also enables him to prolong the act sufficiently for his partner to reach full orgasm, thereby releasing her most potent secretions for his benefit. In effect, he ‘kills two birds with one stone’, preserving his own essence while releasing and absorbing hers.” – The Tao of Health, Sex and Longevity, Daniel Reid

You WILL mess up

It is to be expected that, especially in the beginning, you will lose your control and come when you didn’t want to. Even with all the tricks up my sleeve there were a few times these past couple of months where I went too far and came when I didn’t want to. 

Don’t beat yourself up over it! It’s all part of the learning curve. Get back on the horse, double down on your Jing-boosting herbs and get back at it. It isn’t the end of the world and if you’re using herbs and able to have sex without ejaculation, you’ll bring that sexual energy right back up. 

Speaking of which…

The sexual energy gained from prolonged sex without ejaculation is INSANE

The amount of sexual energy you build up and are able to circulate with tantric sex is out of this world. It blows anything else out of the water, even the more powerful herbs which we haven’t discussed yet. 

It’s the equivalent of plugging into the well of primordial life energy and just JUICING up. That said – this is why you need to have laid a proper groundwork for these practices. You absolutely can short circuit yourself doing these practices if you aren’t prepared. Remember, we’re learning to build up ecstatic energy within the nervous system, causing a cascade of changes within the hormonal/bioelectric systems of the body – the nervous and endocrine systems. This is nothing short of hacking into ecstatic states of consciousness – it’s not something to be taken lightly.

The foundation remains CRITICAL

Again, we are learning to cultivate a type of energy within the nervous system, an energy that affects hormones and, in fact, extends many feet out from the body. You absolutely must prepare the nervous system for handling higher loads of prana/Qi or the results will range from uncomfortable to psych ward. Just look into kundalini syndrome if you have your doubts.

This is why I espouse the benefits of yoga so much – through its postures, breathing exercises and meditation you strengthen and gain control of the nervous system, allowing it to handle the higher wattage produced from Semen Retention and tantric sex. The postures squeeze and tone the endocrine system, regulating and optimizing hormones. The breathing exercises directly regulate the nervous system, and meditation strengthens and calms the mind. It is the perfect complementary practice to Semen Retention, which is why Brahmacharya is an integral part of higher yoga practices.

This is NOT for beginners

It goes without saying, but this practice is absolutely not for beginners. Those starting on the path need lots of time to get used to building and working with sexual energy, carnal desires, and the biological urge to procreate. You MUST master these urges before you attempt to have sex w/o release.

The ONLY exception to this rule is for those that want to begin Semen Retention while already in a relationship. Practice all the techniques solo, then practice them while edging, and then get your lady on board and try it out during sex. You’ll still need to tamper and modify your sex life, but I can’t paint in broad strokes in regards to people’s individual sex lives – you’ll have to tailor that as you see fit.

Most helpful practices

By far the most beneficial practice for sex without release is kegels. In yoga this is known as vajroli mudra, which means thunderbolt gesture, and which I haven’t touched upon much yet. Besides the yogic theory behind it, vajroli mudra is essentially identical to kegels, which hopefully you sons a bitches have been practicing. Do kegels often, whenever you think to. Quick short holds, medium length holds, longer holds, and don’t forget reverse kegels, where it feels like you’re trying to piss as fast as possible. An easy regimen would be 20 pulsed quick holds, 10 medium length holds (2-3 seconds), 5 long holds (5 seconds), and 10 reverse kegels, held for 3 seconds. Do this routine once or twice a day.

The next would be testicle breathing. This is almost identical to the spinal breathing we’ve been discussing in previous posts, except it involves a few tweaks, namely a coordinated combination of kegels, breathing and contracting the muscles around the perineum/prostate. In its complete form, it also involves bringing that energy down the front channel and storing it in the third chakra – this will be detailed in an upcoming post. While kegels help you to not come too fast, testicle breathing helps you to draw that sexual energy upward and away from your dick, which not only helps prevent orgasm, but recharges the entire body/mind complex with fresh, juicy sexual energy. This is not as difficult to perform during sex as you would think, especially if you have been practicing it during solo masturbation sessions.

Schisandra is a great help in keeping your seed inside. It doesn’t compare to having practiced and mastered kegels or testicle breathing, but in a game where so much is at stake, every little bit helps. Not only does it boost your sexual energy and sperm production, its astringent qualities help to lock both semen and sexual energy inside, so you don’t lose your precious seed during sex.

One factor reigns supreme in all of this though, and is more important than any technique available – a willing and understanding partner. When you’re in the heat of the moment and she’s grinding her hips and pelvis into you, pulling you deeper and deeper inside and asking you to fuck her harder… Good luck, buddy. If you and she aren’t on the same page it’s almost a guarantee you’ll lose your seed.

You have to rethink how you go about having sex in general. The goal is no longer to reach orgasm – no more pounding away like porn has taught you (which isn’t what most women want anyway), no more jackrabbiting, no more sexual bravado. Sex is no longer a race or a battle or a conquest – take your damn time, enjoy yourself. Pull out if you’re getting too close to orgasm and explore the rest of her body, give yourself time to cool off.

And while you’ll be lasting longer, the goal also shouldn’t be for her to orgasm, though this should be much easier and is beneficial for you too. The goal is now to cultivate sexual energy, getting close to orgasm, slowing down and circulating it, and then repeating the process… All the while remembering that your lady needs pleasing too.

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Get Your Head Straight

I wrote this piece as a reminder to myself on what the proper mindset to have on this path would be, although these principles apply to any discipline in life.

Fall in Love with the Process

One of the most important lessons I’ve learned in my short time here on this earth is to be process oriented, not goal oriented.

Obviously we need to be setting new goals, working to accomplish the ones we already have, all the while constantly tweaking and refining our methodologies.

The problem is, once most people set their goals, they remain myopically focused on just the goal. Let’s say you want to look like Brad Pitt in Fight Club. In your mind, this is the ideal physique, and if you could just look this way, all your problems – with the ladies at least – would be solved. You watch Fight Club four times a week, you research Brad’s training program, you cut out pics of him shirtless and bloody in that dungeon of a basement. No homo, of course.

You switch your diet up and start eating “healthy”. You hate the food, but you keep the fantasy in your mind of you looking shredded, bruh. You start hitting the gym. It’s gruesome, tiresome, and frankly kinda embarrassing how weak you are, but you think about all the ladies you’ll get once you’re ripped. Hell, maybe you even start taking Muay Thai or Jiu Jitsu to get a “fighter’s physique”, whatever that is.

And then you quit after two months. What gives? You wanted so badly to look ripped, to be a badass, to get all the ladies. You still want that, in fact. So why did you quit?

You quit because you were goal-oriented, not process-oriented. You did shit you hated in hopes of achieving some far-off goal, instead of learning to love the healthy habits that will get you there.

What you should have been doing instead was falling in love with the process.

Finding a workout program that is both challenging and rewarding, and loving the slow change you start to see in your physique.

Finding bomb recipes of healthy foods and learning how to prep and cook them exactly how you want them to taste.

Learning to love how it feels to go to bed just a little hungry, because that physical hunger will transfer over into your personality, and you’ll become hungry for life itself.

You learn to find pleasure and joy in bettering yourself for yourself, not so you can bang every girl in your social circle.

“You do not rise to the level of your goals – you fall to the level of your systems.” James Clear, Atomic Habits

Same applies with Semen Retention. Learn to love the daily discipline, the daily growth, the daily challenge. Don’t do this for some grand prize that is months or years away. All you have is the present moment, the here and now. Revel in the fact that each day you’re improving yourself, each day you’re better than the day before. 

You might not notice many changes or benefits at first, although some of us do. Again, don’t be focused on and looking for benefits. Trust the process! You can’t transform your physique over night, or even in a month or two. It takes many months, if not years, to build a truly impressive physique. Day by day you may not notice much, but month by month? You can begin to see your body change.

Same with semen retention. Some people might feel amazing after a week of retention, some not so much. Everyone will notice vast improvements after a few months though. Think long term, not short term. Think end game.

And if you slip up, reframe it as a learning experience. Whatever caused you to slip up, well, you’ll be better prepared next time.

Set a goal and then fall in love with the process – don’t chase results. 

Change Your Identification

After learning to love the process, we must learn to overhaul our identity. 

Let’s keep someone wanting to lose some weight as our example. They set a goal – to lose 50 pounds. They may have the best workout plan available, the best trainer money can buy, and they’re following their diet to a T. 

After a few months, lo and behold, they’ve lost the weight! And after a few more months, they’ve gained it all back, and then some.

Why? They didn’t fundamentally change who they were. In other words, they were still a person who used foods for comfort, who loved relaxing at home binging Netflix and eating Rocky Road ice cream, who hated the effort of working out, who never learned how to prepare healthy food in an appetizing way. To be a bit blunt, they were still just a fat person in a fit person’s body.

“Behavior that is incongruent with the self will not last… You may want better health, but if you continue to prioritize comfort over accomplishment, you’ll be drawn to relaxing rather than training… The ultimate form of intrinsic motivation is when a habit becomes part of your identity.” – James Clear, Atomic Habits

Keep that quip in your mind at all times – “If you continue to prioritize comfort over accomplishment, you’ll be drawn to relaxing rather than training.” For us, training doesn’t mean so much physical training, but training our mind, our emotions, desires, fears, habits.

James goes on to say,

  • The goal is not to read a book, the goal is to become a reader.
  • The goal is not to run a marathon, the goal is to become a runner.
  • The goal is not to learn an instrument, the goal is to become a musician.

Therefore, our goal is not to hit 30, 60, or 90 days. Our goal is to become a man in harmony with and in control of himself, including his sexual desires. Once we become that man, 90 days (and beyond) will come easy. 

We need to fundamentally change how we view ourselves, and how we view sex and women in general. 

We must transform from pleasure-seeking monkeys that mindlessly smash our dopamine buttons into men who love striving for what’s best for ourselves. 

We need to learn how to view sex as a means of self-transformation, not as the end-all be-all, granddaddy of all pleasures. 

We need to view temporary, voluntary celibacy as a necessary practice for self-growth. 

And we need to start viewing women as actual people, as friends, as fascinating partners for personal growth, not just as warm bodies to come inside of or notches on our belts.

Avoid Quick Fixes

Studies on delayed gratification show that kids who chose to put off a small but immediate reward in favor of a bigger reward that they had to wait for went much further in life than kids who took the quick fix. It was shown that the ability and preference to delay gratification is correlated with academic success, physical and mental health, as well as social competence.

The obvious ramification for us is to not watch porn and beat our meat into a sad, chafed state. We put off these tiny, fleeting, empty pleasures in our quest to become the ultimate version of ourselves. But putting off the small, meaningless pleasures in favor of the big wins applies far beyond semen retention. Start practicing delaying gratification in all aspects of your life.

This all goes back to Stoicism and learning to embrace discomfort like we discussed in Part 4 – This Is Your Brain on Semen Retention. To make it anywhere in life you must break free from the shackles of comfort and immediate sense gratification. You must learn to ignore the near-infinite amount of tiny distractions so that you’re able to focus on the big goals in your life.

These tiny distractions, which give you nothing but miniscule and ephemeral hits of dopamine but no true satisfaction, drain you of the will to accomplish your actual goals, which are the source of true satisfaction. Brush these distractions to the side. Stand up tall and delay that immediate, flimsy-ass satisfaction in favor of chipping away at your actual goals. The feeling of satisfaction gained from accomplishing something real and challenging is 1,000 times greater than the empty stimulation from browsing Reddit or dicking around on the same video game you’ve played one hundred times before.

More importantly, the sense of gratification and accomplishment of achieving a hard-earned goal creates a positive feedback loop, leading to you wanting to accomplish other big goals. Success begets even more success.

Starve the weeds of distraction at the roots, embrace discomfort and forgo the empty stimulation that fritters away your psychic and mental energies – that is the deeper meaning of Brahmacharya.

Within yoga, the practice of tapas, which literally translates as “heat” or “to burn”, is the practice of austerities. These austerities are the fire that burns away the dross of the mind. This can take on many, many forms, from extended fasting, to braving the heat and the cold, to even the practices we’re currently doing – yoga postures, pranayama, and meditation. One simple form that I practice every day is simple delaying of gratification. 

You get a text from a cute girl – most guys open it immediately and read it, even respond immediately. Or, you can notice that urge in your mind, leave your phone where it is, and check it and respond in 15 minutes. Not only have you built up some willpower, you’ve also created a bit of tension as the girl sits around wondering, “Why hasn’t he responded yet?” Congrats, you remained in control, you just leveled up.

You open the fridge and immediately reach for a soda – do you follow through with this unhealthy desire? Or do you turn it down and reach for something healthier? Boom, leveled up again.

How many times a day do you pick up your phone to check if you have any notifications, even though it’s been sitting right next to you and you know you don’t? Ignore that impulse, master your mind! 

QUOTE: "If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?" --Rumi | Rumi quotes, Irritated quotes, Cool words

The above is one of my favorite quotes of all time. Life presents you with an excellent battleground to learn to train and master your mind – use it wisely.

Be mindful of those nigh subconscious urges to waste time, overcome them, and spend that time wisely. Those little distracting urges are like weeds in your mind – starve them out. These little wins add up, and then when you have the urge to masturbate, guess what? You’ve got so much positive momentum going that it’s a cinch to turn that urge down too.

When have you ever gone to bed feeling happy and content from browsing the internet and masturbating all day? Compare that to the feeling of going to bed knowing you spent the majority of the day productively, and maybe you threw in some Netflix or gaming there at the end. Very different feeling.

Each time you say no to these tiny impulses to distract yourself from existence not being stimulating enough, each time you choose something that builds your skill base or knowledge instead of the mental masturbation of the internet, it’s like you’re doing a mental “rep”. It’s a workout for your mind and your willpower. Enough of these tiny wins every day and you’ll become unstoppable.

“Through tapasya, you are trying to set in motion a process of metabolism, by which all the habits that create weakness and obstruct the awakening of willpower, can be eliminated. You must know what your necessities are. Your life has to be made simpler. You have to make a choice, that’s all. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Either you want samadhi (success in meditation) or you want sensual life. To some extent you may be able to continue, but there comes a moment when you will have to make a departure from sensual life…

That is why tantra is practised. Its purpose is not to indulge in drinking, meat eating or sexual life, but to transcend your addictions. This is an important aspect of spiritual life. Mind is a very good advocate; it always argues for the senses. But in fact, even if you let your senses run riot, that doesn’t bring you happiness. So it doesn’t matter what the mind says. Go on with your tapas.” – Swami Satyananda Saraswati

“Worship of the gods, the twice-born, the teachers and the wise; purity, straightforwardness, celibacy and non-injury – these are called the austerities of the body.

Speech which causes no excitement and is truthful, pleasant and beneficial, the practice of the study of the Vedas – these are called the austerities of speech.

Serenity of mind, good-heartedness, purity of nature, self-control – these are called mental austerity.

This threefold austerity practised by steadfast people with the utmost faith, desiring no reward, they call sattwic (pure, wholesome) austerity.” – Bhagavad Gita, 17:14-17

Expect No Reward

I was speaking with another Redditor who became interested in yoga through the practice of semen retention. We got on the topic of the myriad different forms of yoga, and I mentioned karma yoga, the path of unselfish action. Basically, your every action is done with complete awareness, as an offering to God/the Ultimate/the Universe/your Highest Self, and is done without any expectation of award. 

You do the dishes with complete awareness, and you do them because they need to be done, not to please your wife in hopes that it’ll lead to your one night of sex this week. You do your job at work with complete mindfulness, and not with the hope of getting a raise, but because it’s your damn job. 

While I’m not trying to push this practice on anyone, I think the aspect of not expecting rewards is very beneficial for us on the path. Many of us hear about semen retention and all the nearly magical powers that can come along with it, and all the benefits it can bring, and so we start expecting these things, right off the bat in some cases.

In my eyes, this is the absolute worst way to go about things. You’ll constantly be second-guessing every little aspect of your life, looking at everything that happens to you under a giant magnifying glass, wondering if this is because of this benefit you heard about, or if that was because of that other benefit. 

If a girl looks your way, is it because of your magnetic aura?? Or was she just looking around the room and noticed you were already looking at her? 

You wake up and you’re feeling kinda blah today. Are you flatlining?? Or did you forget that not every day is gonna be the BEST. DAY. EVER?

If you’re constantly on the lookout for, and striving after, any of these seemingly magical benefits we get from SR, you’re just shooting yourself in the foot. It’s kind of like befriending a wild animal, or your neighbor’s cat. Just do your thing, don’t chase after the cat. When the cat is ready and comfortable around you, she’ll walk up, sniff at you, maybe rub up on your leg. If you try to pet her, she’ll just run off, so just keep on doing you and ignoring her.

The same thing applies to any “powers” gained from the path of retention. Maybe that girl was looking at you cuz your aura is growing all huge and magnetic – great, no biggie. As some obscure band from the 60’s was fond of saying, “Let it be”.

This is for YOU

Don’t do any of this for anyone other than yourself. Don’t walk this path to attract and seduce females. Don’t practice retention in the hopes of gaining the respect of other guys, or, worse yet, to intimidate them. 

Practice SR for one reason and one reason only – self mastery. If you can conquer your sexual desire, you’ve slayed perhaps the biggest dragon of your psyche. A better analogy is you’ve tamed that dragon, and now have the most powerful ally in all the kingdom.

Semen retention is for you, and you alone.

“For a man to conquer himself is the first and noblest of all victories.” – Plato

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Intro to Tantra

This post is gonna be a two-parter. This first part is on the background and theory of what Tantra is, with the follow up post being the actual techniques used.

When it comes to Semen Retention, one of the most dangerous things you can do is entertain the idea of anything sexually stimulating. Porn, edging, hell, even looking at or thinking too much about the enticing female form is off the table for many of us, and rightfully so. It’s what led us down this path, spiraling out of control.

So why, of all things, am I about to start discussing how to masturbate and even have sex in order to supercharge our SR practice?

For one reason and one reason only – tantric methods are, by far, the most powerful way to speed up our evolution on this path. 

From the Chinese classic Secrets of the Jade Bedroom –

“Rainbow Girl: It is generally assumed that a man gains great pleasure from ejaculation. But when he learns of the Tao of Yin and Yang, he will ejaculate less and less. Will this not diminish his pleasure as well?

Pen-Tze: Not at all! After ejaculating, a man feels tired, his ears buzz, his eyes get heavy, and he longs for sleep. He is thirsty and his limbs feel weak and stiff. By ejaculating, he enjoys a brief moment of sensation but suffers long hours of weariness as a result. This is no true pleasure!

However, if a man regulates his ejaculations to an absolute minimum and retains his semen, his body will grow strong, his mind will be clear, and his vision and hearing will improve. While the man must occasionally deny himself the fleeting sensation of ejaculation, his love for his woman will greatly increase. He will feel as if he could never get enough of her. Is that not the true and lasting pleasure of sex?” 

There are Two Paths

While it’s more nuanced than this, let’s split spiritual practice, and by extension, semen retention, into two camps. That of renunciation, and that of tantra. 

The path of the renunciate is where we all begin, and where many of us may stay indefinitely. It is by no means the inferior of the two paths, and seeing as it is the basis for tantra, one might even consider it to be the superior of the two. It is powerful, effective, and most importantly, safe. It’s only downfall is it is slower.

In the path of renunciation, we give up all things sexual. We give up porn, we give up masturbation, and we sure as hell give up sex. When the goal is to retain semen, why would we be having sex? It’s almost a guaranteed spillage of precious seed. 

In the beginning, we might be extremely strict. We modify our environment to remove as much temptation as possible. We unfollow IG accounts that post photos of scantily clad women, we stop hanging out with our attractive female friends or buddies who only talk about getting laid, and we may even avoid social situations that could arouse lust within. These are temporary but necessary limitations we impose on ourselves – remember, “discipline equals freedom”.

As time progresses, and we build confidence in our practice, we may relax things a bit. We’ve gained enough mastery that hanging around attractive females is no longer a trigger. We brush off our buddies’ discussions about their weekend conquests, or attempts thereof. While we prob shouldn’t follow accounts or subreddits dedicated to naked females, we may be strong enough to follow accounts that post the occasional dimepiece. 

Then there is the path of Tantra. After a certain level of confidence has grown in our practice, and a certain amount of self-mastery, a few of us may decide to take things to the next level. 

The risk is great, but the reward is even greater.

We realize that maybe, just maybe, we can use our own desire to further our practice. Just as a smoking piece of wood quickly catches aflame as it is tossed in the fire, so too can our practice go from smouldering to ablaze through using our own desire.

The person on the tantric path learns how to masturbate in such a way to stir up his sexual energy, and then uses tantric techniques to further increase and circulate this energy. 

He learns how to look at an image of a beautiful female and use the desire it stirs within him to accomplish his real lifes work.

The most advanced amongst them even learn how to have sex in such a way as to stoke the sexual energy within, magnifying it many times over, circulating it blissfully throughout the body, all the while absorbing the Yin Jing of the females secretions or “elixers”.

The man on this path walks a dangerous tight-rope. Learning the techniques and the patience to keep his sexual excitement within 90-95% of climax, and being able to focus internally on the circulation and transmutation of this energy is no small feat, to say the least. 

Almost everyone will fail their first few times having tantric sex. With the right practice and Jing-building herbs, this is but a minor setback. 

Many will try it and, realizing its difficulty, give up the practice and return to the path of renunciation – and there ain’t a damn thing wrong with that.

Unfortunately, a few will try out this path and, after indulging and failing to retain their seed, give up the practice of semen retention all together. This is most unfortunate but is a real risk, so keep it in mind. 

However, the persistent among us, those willing to take their time, who have properly prepared, and who are willing to keep practicing… These men will see their practice, and entire life, explode into whole new dimensions of bliss and self-realization. 

Speaking on the difference between these two paths, Lama Yeshe writes,

“The behavior of someone following this path (the path of renunciation) to individual liberation is therefore characterized by extreme self-control. The practitioner posts a strict guard at the door of the senses and is extremely suspicious of whatever wants to enter…

Compared to a system like tantra, which actually uses the energy of desire, this cautious approach to the spiritual path is considered inferior… Tantra’s approach is very different. Instead of viewing pleasure and desire as something to be avoided at all costs, tantra recognizes the powerful energy aroused by our desires to be an indispensable resource for the spiritual path.Because the goal is nothing less than the realization of our highest human potential, tantra seeks to transform every experience – no matter how ‘unreligious’ it may appear – into the path of fulfillment. It is precisely because our present life is so inseparably linked with desire that we must make use of desire’s tremendous energy if we wish to transform our life into something transcendental… 

Thus the logic of tantra is really very simple: our experience of ordinary pleasure can be used as the resource for attaining the supremely pleasurable experience of totality, or enlightenment.

The function of tantra is to transform all pleasures into the transcendental experience of deep penetrative awareness. Instead of advocating separation from worldly pleasures the way many other traditions do, tantra emphasizes that it is much more effective for human beings to enjoy themselves and channel the energy of their enjoyments into a quick and powerful path to fulfillment and enlightenment.”

Powerful stuff. The thing is, you must be thoroughly established in SR and completely overhaul your worldview for this practice to bear fruit. You MUST have a solid foundation set, a regular routine that is practiced daily, and have spent some serious time working with your mind, it’s desires, urges and emotions. If you have difficulty making it a couple months without PMO, tantra is likely not for you.. Yet.

While I can’t speak for Lama Yeshe, when he calls the path of renunciation “inferior”, I take it to mean that the path of tantra is more suitable for those of us still living in the world of everyday life, surrounded by temptations and mundane pleasures. We can’t all go full monk mode and live in an ashram, monastery or hermitage, dedicating our lives to spiritual practice, nor should most of us. 

If we begin our practice of Semen Retention with renunciation, starving the constantly hungry sex drive and asserting our rightful dominance over the dominion of craving that is the libido, we set a solid foundation for when the time comes to practice tantra. 

Tantra, Dual Cultivation, and Karezza

Just as true yoga has little to do with soccer moms in pink yoga pants, true tantra actually has very little to do with sex. Or masturbation. Or anything sexual at all really. 

Tantra is all about using your natural desires as a means for spiritual evolution.

Tantra can be translated as a “weave” or “web”, and comes from the Sanskrit verbal root “tan”, meaning to expand. Tantra is therefore the practice and philosophy of expanding consciousness.

As Georg Feuerstein states, “According to esoteric explanations, tantra is that which expands jnana,which can either mean ‘knowledge’ or ‘wisdom’.”

Tantra is a means of transcending ordinary reality by diving deep into and through ordinary reality. Every experience, be it sex, listening to music, getting into an argument or eating a slice of pizza is seen as a manifestation of the divine, and thus can be used for transcendence.

While that’s all well and good, us scalawags on this sub are mostly interested in the sexual aspect of tantra. Within yogic systems of tantra, sex is used not only as means of spiritual transformation, of cultivating immense energy and bliss, but also a means of worshipping the divine feminine principle of the universe, Shakti. Shakti, the divine feminine, represents all energy in the universe – prana, Qi, kundalini, electricity, fire, ATP within the mitochondria – all of it is Shakti. By worshipping Shakti via tantric sex, you are actively worshipping the very same energy within your own body that you’ve been cultivating and sublimating this whole time.

Sex transforms from just a small, momentary explosion of pleasure followed by a limp dick and regret into a science of extended bliss and self-transcendence.

Within Qi Gong, tantric sex or “dual cultivation” is less a means of worship and more of a way to simply increase Jing and Qi, to cultivate and circulate sexual energy. Further, you didn’t have to be a spiritual practitioner to use these techniques. The common folk were well aware of them, as well as *Jing-*boosting, aphrodisiac herbs, just as a means of sexual enjoyment and boosting overall health.

These practices differ from karezza and “coitus resveratus” in the fact that they are energy-based and used as a means for spiritual evolution. Karezza is simply having normal sex and not ejaculating. There aren’t fancy breathing exercises, visualizations, mudras or bandhas, and usually there generally isn’t any non-ejaculatory orgasm, in contrast to Taoist/tantric sex, where all of these aspects usually play a role. 

Regardless, the techniques provided are useful for any type of non-ejaculatory sex, and any type of non-ejaculatory sex provides great benefit for us on the Semen Retention path.

Benefits of Tantric Sex

Whether you practice yogic tantric sex, Taoist “dual-cultivaton” style, or just plain karezza/non-ejaculatory sex, you reap massive benefits. 

Let’s start with karezza. You simply have sex, taking your time and going slow enough that you don’t orgasm. You’re focused on the act of sex itself, without the goal of orgasming. There are two main benefits to be had from this style of love making. 

First, it frees up and liberates a lot of sexual energy, which, if you know what you’re doing, you can then sublimate and circulate throughout the body-mind complex. You can do this during or after sex, or not at all, just enjoying sex for what is – physical intimacy with a special lady friend.

Second, from a Taoist perspective, the act of sex allows you to absorb the female’s “yin essence” – the hormones, peptides and other goodies found in her vaginal secretions. Of course, this implies that you are having sex without a condom, which carries its own risks and caveats, namely it must be consenual, you should both be free of STDs and hopefully the girl is on birth control, in case you slip up and bust a nut. Sperm can be found in pre-ejaculate as well, so consider yourself warned.

As Daniel Reid unpoetically states in The Tao of Health, Sex and Longevity,

“In both men and women, sexual secretions contain many pure, potent, biochemically active substances: hormones, enzymes, proteins, vitamins and other elements. When female secretions are released into the warm, moist environment of the vagina during intercouse, they come into direct contact with the sensitive, paper-thin skin of the man’s blood-engorged penis. Body heat opens wide the pores of this stretched skin, and the rhythmic rubbing of vagina and penis causes biochemically significant amounts of female ‘essence’ to be absorbed by the male.”

He continues, “For men, frequent intercourse with infrequent ejaculation is the key technique for cultivating sexual essence and energy. Furthermore, retaining semen during intercourse enables a man not only to preserve and reabsorb his own essence, it also enables him to prolong the act sufficiently for his partner to reach full orgasm, thereby releasing her most potent secretions for his benefit.”

Tantric sex and Taoist “dual cultivaton” are both essentially the same, unless you factor in the act of worshipping the divine from the tantra side of things. You receive the same benefits as karezza, but tantric and Taoist sex is, in itself, a type of energy work and meditation. You actively sublimate and circulate the sexual energy that is created during the act of lovemaking, both during and after the act. This leads to states of extreme bliss, as well as the possibility of altered states of consciousness, although these things don’t have to be a goal and are not guaranteed.

If you’re a skilled practitioner, you’re also able to cultivate bliss in such a way that you have multiple, full-body orgasms, without spilling your seed! Believe me when I say that this takes a lot of practice and, most difficult of all, finding a partner that’s willing to help you learn how to do this.

Taoists also speak of “solo cultivation”, which, as the name implies, is using masturbation in such a way as to cultivate and circulate sexual energy on your own. While it is less effective than dual cultivation, solo cultivation is a useful practice to not only learn to get the hang of the internal energy work that you use during tantric sex, but also to get the body used to getting close to orgasm before stopping and cooling off. It is essentially “tantric edging”.

I highly suggest that you have a solid 60-90 days of retention under your belt before you begin flirting with the idea of solo or dual cultivation. It’s also highly recommended that you are proficient in the sublimation techniques I’ve given in posts 2, 3, and 7, and that you become proficient in the techniques in Part 2 of this series on Tantra before you start messing around with edging or tantric sex.

May I also gently remind you horndogs that this is not a green light to go back to your sleazy ways of watching porn and scrolling through NSFW subs all day, every day. That will still fuck your brain up and drain you of tons of energy and dopamine, even if you’re doing “solo cultivation” practices. You still need to be “guarding the sense doors” the majority of the time.

To give you an idea of the power of these practices, after a few weeks/months of practice, you should be able to have sex or receive a blow job and make the conscious decision of whether you would like to orgasm or not. Having sex without orgasm always leaves me feeling invigorated and empowered, and I’m always ready for more, as compared to sex with release, which leaves me feeling drained and sleepy, with a few days of a “sex hangover” – basically just feeling lazy and less motivated. 

“The art of the bedroom consists of suppressing emissions, absorbing the woman’s fluids, and making semen return to strengthen the brain, thereby attaining longevity.” – Pien Chang’s Dynastic History of the Later Han

Mindset

Before you begin attempting tantric sex or even “solo cultivation”, you need to change your view of the world within and around you.

Remember, tantra is a way of viewing every experience as a play of the divine – everything becomes holy, no matter how mundane or profane. Those with a spiritual or religious bend can fit this way of thinking into their given paradigms. For those of us who are atheist or agnostic, simply view everything in terms of a purely energetic standpoint.

Everything you see around you, the world of physical matter, is just condensed energy. Nothing is “good” or “bad”, everything is just energy moving about in different forms, and thus everything can be used for self-transcendence, if viewed properly.

The spiritual aspirant views the world as a training ground, where he uses everyday experiences as a means to purify the mind and emotions. The semen retention practitioner should view sex and non-ejaculatory masturbation as a training ground for increasing and sublimating sexual energy.

See a beautiful lady walking towards you? Feel that sexual energy rise up, embrace it, and view it not as lust but rather as a powerful means for bliss and self-transformation.

Feeling horny? Good, the drive to be a man and create new life is still strong within you, the flame has not been extinguished. Reframe it as not just a means to fuck a girl, but a means to make love to existence itself and birth a whole new you. 

Realize that your attraction to a beautiful lady is really your male energy craving union with female energy – and she experiences the same in reverse. Yang craves Yin, and vice versa.

Read Reddit user u/redjohnagain’s The Earth is a Woman (Part 1).

If you’re having sex with a gal, don’t view her as just a soft and warm thing to come inside of. Her body is a temple, and you should worship it, not just with your cock but with your mind, using her body, energy and soul to help you create untold levels of bliss within. And fellas, don’t forget – you should be aiming to please her as well you scoundrel, don’t be so self-involved that you forget she wants to feel good too. 

And while we should never put women on a pedestal, we should always feel grateful for a chance to merge with that divine feminine energy we crave so much.

And in fact, any desire you feel for anything, and any experience you have, can be transformed for spiritual means. I’ll leave that to you to study as it goes beyond the scope of Semen Retention.

“Like the sun, which dries up everything, or like fire, which consumes everything, so the yogin enjoys everything but is not stained by sin.” Kula-Arnava-Tantra, 9.76

“One should cultivate desire by means of desire. One should cast desire into desire. Desiring by means of desire, abiding in desire, one should stir the world.” – Vamaka-Ishvara-Tantra, 4.46

“For a man to nurture his male powers, he must nourish his Yang essence by absorbing Yin essence. When men and women indulge freely in sex, exchanging their bodily fluids and breathing each other’s breath, it is like fire and water meeting in such perfect proportions that neither one defeats the other. Man and woman should ebb and flow in intercourse like the waves and currents of the sea, first one way, then another, but always in harmony with the Great Tide. In this manner, they may continue all night long, constantly nourishing and preserving their precious vital essence, curing all ailments, and promoting long life. Without this basic harmony of Yin and Yang, neither medicines refined from the five minerals, nor the most potent aphrodisiacs, will be of any use. If the vital essences are dried up due to excessive emission or complete neglect, they can never be revived.” Su-Nu Ching

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Overcoming Wet Dreams

I’ve seen multiple Reddit posts recently about people having issues with wet dreams and nocturnal emissions, so let’s have a little chat about the topic.

Repressed Sexuality

I think the biggest issue for a lot of guys on this path is that they mistakenly wind up repressing all sexual thoughts and feelings. This repression and bottling up of sexual feelings means that they wind up getting expressed when we’re no longer in control, oftentimes in an explosion of jizzum while we’re asleep. This is awfully frustrating when we’re putting so much conscious effort into not ejaculating in the waking world.

When you go on the semen retention path, it’s important to not have things in your environment that stimulate sexual thoughts. So we cut out racey accounts that we follow, avoid going out to bars with all the scantily clad girls, and we definitely cut out porn. But we’re left with one very fundamental thing that we can’t just “cut out” – our mind. You may have removed every possibility of seeing a sexually stimulating image, but controlling the mind and its desire for the female form is a bit trickier.

So many of us repress these thoughts, desires, and cravings. This is not the move! Just like letting little annoying things that your girlfriend does bottle up until it bursts out of you in an embarrassing display of frustration and anger, bottling up and repressing sexual thoughts/desires leads to, well.. A different kind of embarrassing explosion.

The trick is to allow these thoughts and desires to pop up, remaining aware yet detached. In Part 5 – The Alpha and the Omega, we discussed a type of meditation where you just remain a passive observer to thoughts as they arise, as if they were just ephemeral clouds passing through your mind. 

You guys have been practicing this, right?

“Your goal is to identify as the passive witness to all these thoughts/images/feelings as they arise. They are like clouds, coming about on their own, evolving and changing on their own, and fading away.”

In regards to emotions, “I’ve found it helpful to reframe emotions as just flavors of energy that come into my field of consciousness, stick around for a quick sec, and then start fading away. They’re impermanent and only hold as much weight as you give them.”

So instead of repressing and shoving sexual thoughts and desires down into your subconscious, where they’ll simply explode out of your dick while you sleep, just remain detachedly aware of them. The goal is to learn to identify as that part of you that is pure awareness, and to view your thoughts and emotions (sexual or otherwise) as an interesting and amusing thing that seems to be playing out in front of you. 

In this way, sexual thoughts and desires get fully acknowledged, not repressed. The energy that makes them up is able to be expressed, without shaking your strong foundation of mindfulness. 

It can be tricky, cuz these types of thoughts are sticky – they have a tendency to suck you in and pull you and your Johnson along for a ride. That’s why this is a good meditation to practice with everyday thoughts and emotions.

Learning to identify as “the witness”, that impersonal but imperturbable aspect of pure awareness, will get you far in life, not just in retention. The more you identify with the witness, and less with your thoughts, emotions, and desires, the less you’ll be swayed by the ups and downs of life.

Lack of or Improper Sublimation

I reckon that many on this sub that are still struggling with nocturnal emissions aren’t taking their sublimation practices seriously. When you retain and begin building that sexual energy up, if you don’t actively sublimate it and circulate it throughout the whole body/mind complex, what do you expect is gonna happen? That energy needs to find an outlet somewhere, and it’s gonna take the route it’s most familiar with.

You don’t have to do the whole yoga/breathing exercise route I espouse, but it is exceptionally good for this issue, specifically siddhasana (Part 7) and the spinal breathing technique from Part 2 and Part 3.

Non-yoga sublimation techniques that would be best would be working out and cold showers or baths before bed, or even just an ice pack on the crotch. Journaling is another way to get those sexual thoughts and emotions expressed without them ruffling your feathers too much. 

Over-stimulated CNS

A big contributing factor is likely that many people experiencing wet dreams are going to bed too stimulated. This could be from too much caffeine late in the day, watching action movies or gaming right before bed, being overly stressed out, or not getting enough exercise. 

Exercise is key here. If you get a solid hour to an hour and a half workout 4-5 times a week, your body will be so busy rebuilding itself and recovering during sleep that it won’t have the energy or need to have a nighttime orgasm. If any of you brothers aren’t exercising you REALLY need to get on it! It is easily almost as beneficial as the semen retention path – the benefits are nearly endless and come quickly. It might not take you as far semen retention but it will improve every aspect of your life. Get on it fellas, whether it’s running, weight lifting, rock climbing, mountain biking, whatevs.

If you’re struggling with wet dreams, cut back on the caffeine/nicotine/adderall, especially later in the day. Avoid video games and movies that are over-stimulating before bed, at least until this issue resolves itself.

Practice some calming breathing exercises just before bed. Along with spinal breathing and alternate nostril breathing, you can practice either box breathing or 1:1:2 breathing.

In box breathing you simply breathe in, hold, exhale, and hold, all for an equal count. Breathe in 5 seconds, hold the breath inside for 5 seconds, exhale for 5 seconds, and hold the breath outside the body for 5 seconds. Repeat for 5-10 minutes.

1:1:2 breathing is similar, except you double the length of the exhale, and omit the external breath retention. So you’d breathe in for 5 seconds, hold for 5 seconds, exhale for 10, and then repeat.

Box breathing is a technique used by Navy Seals to calm down, switching their body from fight-or-flight mode into the relaxing rest-and-digest. 

1:1:2 breathing accomplishes the same thing. The sympathetic nervous system is activated when you breathe in, while the out-breath activates the calming parasympathetic nervous system. You can actually feel your heart beat faster on the inhale and slower on the exhale if you pay close attention. By doubling the length of the exhale, you double the amount of parasympathetic activation.

If you’ve worked up to it, you can also practice alternate nostril breathing in a 1:2 fashion, or a 1:1:2 fashion. The left nostril is the start of the cooling, calming energy channel, while the right nostril is the beginning of the warming, activating energy channel. By equalizing the breath in both nostrils in an alternating fashion, you balance the nervous system.

Kegels

Do your damn kegels! Do ’em all the time, whenever you have a second to think about them. Lots of quick, short holds, medium length holds, long holds. Practice reverse kegels too, as if you were trying to hurry up and piss faster than Sonic the hedgehog.

There are apps out there for you to follow specific routines, but I’ve never used them and don’t see any need to. If that sounds like your jam feel free to check ‘em out.

Kegels not only help to sublimate sexual energy up out of the genitals, it also helps prevent leakage, whether awake or asleep. It’s also a fundamental practice for Tantric sex, if you ever decide to go that route, so get reaaallll comfortable with em.

Set Intentions

What’s the easiest way to have a lucid dream? Go to bed and as you’re drifting off, program your subconscious mind to become lucid while dreaming. Ever had to wake up in the morning for something really important, and even though you forgot to set an alarm, you still woke up early for it? 

The whole thing about sleep is that “you” aren’t consciously there. However, by setting intentions before bed, you can program your subconscious mind to some degree. When you go to bed each night, set an intention to sleep through the night with no leakage. Don’t have a mindset of fear or worry that you’ll have an emission – you’re talking to your subconscious here, you’re talking to yourself – there’s nothing to fear. You’re on the same team, you are the same team.

Tell your subconscious firmly – not angrily – that these wet dreams are no longer serving you, and that your seed and sexual energy are now to be retained and used for self-evolution. Program your mind for a few minutes each night before bed, and then forget about it and drift off to sleep. It’s important to not obsess over it – just set the intention and let it go. Your deeper self will take care of the rest.

On Herbs and Supplements

Back in Part 6 – Cultivating Sexual Energy with Herbs, we discussed some herbal hacks for building and transmuting Jing, our sexual energy. If you’re having issues with wet dreams, I would make sure to avoid cistanche, as it’s not only spermatogenic, but is also a fairly strong aphrodisiac.

While schisandra is also spermatogenic, it has been used for thousands of years by Taoists and practitioners of the “bedroom arts” to help preserve and “lock in” sexual fluids. Its astringent and sour qualities are excellent for this purpose. Because it is a potent adaptogen, it will also help you to destress, and as we covered earlier, being overly stressed is likely contributing to nocturnal emissions.

Ashwagandha would be of use here as well. It increases GABA within the brain, which is our main inhibitory neurotransmitter, helping us to get deep, restorative sleep. It’s adaptogenic and also lowers cortisol, one of our main stress hormones.

Polygala would still be safe to use, and as it helps to build up the “Fourth Treasure”, our willpower, and opens up the “Penetrating Vessel”, allowing sexual energy to be transmuted up the spine from the sexual organs. Polygala on it’s own might be a bit too stimulating right before bed, however. Dragon Herbs has a great product called Will Strengthener which contains some supporting herbs (such as dragon bone – see below) that will help calm the nervous system. If you already bought straight polygala, just make sure to use it in the morning or early afternoon.

A few other things may be important to ensure deep sleep. I would avoid 5-HTP, tryptophan, B Vitamins and melatonin before bed, as these generally increase REM sleep, the stage of sleep where most dreaming, wet or dry, occurs. While we certainly don’t want to abolish REM sleep outright, those struggling with wet dreams probably don’t need anymore than they get naturally.

Magnesium improves deep sleep and is crucially missing from pretty much everyone’s diet, as we’ve done an excellent job of raping and leaving for the dead the soil of our farms here in the West. This is one of those few supplements I think everyone should be taking, especially anyone with sleep issues or anxiety. Magnesium glycinate, chelate, citrate or threonate are all excellent choices.

In Traditional Chinese Medicine, Shen–tonifying herbs are split into two categories – Shen-stabliizing and Shen-developing herbs. The stabilizing herbs help to settle our spirit, mind and emotions. They’re very calming and grounding. Shen-developing herbs, like polygala, help to bring positive emotions to the forefront of our experience. 

Most Shen-stabilizing herbs and formulas are very calming to the nervous system, particularly Pearl powder and the formula bupleurum and dragon bone. Pearl is just what it sounds like, pearls that have been ground up into extremely fine powder. This mineral rich powder helps to “weigh down” the electrical impulses of the nerves. 

Bupleurum and dragon bone is the most widely used anti-stress formula in TCM. “Dragon bone” refers to pulverized remains of fossilized animal bones, traditionally mastodon. Yeah, they go hard in TCM. Again, this mineral-rich compound is “heavy” in the sense that it calms the nervous system, and also has the same astringent property that schisandra has, helping to “lock in” sexual energy and fluids.

Bupleurum and dragon bone is “known for its ability to help stabilize addictive-compulsive behavior and is widely used in the withdrawal from the addiction to smoking, drinking, and a large variety of addictive drugs by both lessening the cravings for the drug and reducing the common withdrawal symptoms… It is said to improve willpower, strengthen the mind, and reduce anxiety, frustration, and anger.”

Dragon bone itself is useful for nocturnal emissions. As Ron Teeguarden states in The Ancient Wisdom of the Chinese Tonic Herbs, “It is often used in formulas to control seminal emission… It is often found in formulas designed to enhance male sexual performance. In this usage, it has a calming effect on the mind, preventing premature ejaculation, as well as the astringent action, which literally locks in semen.”

Recommended Products –

Drs. Best Magnesium Glycinate Lysinate

Jing Herbs Pearl Powder

Dragon Herbs Pearl Capsules

Jing Herbs Bupleurum and Dragon Bone Powder

Dragon Herbs Bupleurum and Dragon Bone Capsules

Dragon Herbs Will Strengthener

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Part 3 – Strengthening Your Aura and Personal Magnetism

Part 1

Part 2

Another long post, fellas. Grab your favorite drink and settle in…

One of our favorite things about SR is suddenly we start to have a magnetic effect on those around us. It starts off as a subtle thing, but like with all things SR, it grows and grows. Like many of the best things in life, if you told the average bloke about it, they’d blow you off. But after retaining for a while, they too would realize that it’s not fantasy, it’s real.

I’m talking about that seemingly unexplainable magnetic aura we develop as we continue to build up our personal power. Girls pick right up on this, and it’s why all of a sudden you’re getting looks daily on the street, and why girls you’ve known for years suddenly make a lot more eye contact than they used to. Men pick up on this as well, though in quite a different way, and animals and especially kids are sensitive to your magnetic aura.

So why the hell would not jacking off cause this big shift in our aura? Pheromones might be playing a role, as they are present in semen. No doubt your body language plays a big role as well, considering the correlation between higher T levels/lower cortisol levels and body language. And I’m sure your palms losing all that hair makes a huuuuge difference.

r/Semenretention - Part 3 - Strengthening Your Aura and Personal Magnetism

But the real answer is that you’ve dramatically increased the actual energetic field around your body.

Ojas and the Pranamaya Kosha

Ok, so we know that by retaining semen, we conserve and build up our Jing/Ojas. Jing/Ojas is kind of like the fuel for Qi/Prana, our bioelectric energy. Simply by conserving, we build up Ojas which transforms into Prana.

The term Pranamaya kosha is the name ancient yogis gave this field of energy within and around them. So when we retain semen, that energy field grows larger and stronger, simply by the virtue that Jing transforms into Qi, or Ojas into Prana. But there are many, many ways to increase the strength and size of this field.

The Heart’s (Holographic?) Electromagnetic Field

According to the HeartMath Institute,

“The heart’s electrical field is about 60 times greater in amplitude than the electrical activity generated by the brain. This field, measured in the form of an electrocardiogram (ECG), can be detected anywhere on the surface of the body. Furthermore, the magnetic field produced by the heart is more than 100 times greater in strength than the field generated by the brain and can be detected up to 3 feet away from the body, in all directions”.

r/Semenretention - Part 3 - Strengthening Your Aura and Personal Magnetism

According to Joseph Chilton Pearce in The Biology of Transcendence, about 80% of the brain’s mass is made up of glial cells, which acts like glue for our neurons, and these glial cells are electromagnetically sensitive. He explains that in the heart’s electromagnetic field, our glial cells pick up on information encoded in that field, and thus the energy our heart radiates affects our brain cells and our perception of the world around us.

“This torus function is apparently holographic, meaning that any point within the torus contains the information of the whole field. That is, at any location within the heart’s field, no matter how infinitesimal, all the frequencies of the heart’s spectrum are present.”

This 2019 study confirms that glial cells are affected by EMFs, concluding, “Elucidating the exact mechanisms of EMF actions upon microglia and astrocytes, and its role in neuro-restoration, could be a key step in further research of the therapeutic potential of EMFs in various neurological disorders.”

That’s all well and dandy, but who cares if my brain’s glial cells are picking up on my own heart-based electromagnetic field? Keep reading my friend.

Heart Rate Variability

Our heart rate variability (HRV) is the term given to the fact that our heart beat changes ever so slightly from moment to moment. This is a good thing – it means our heart is healthy and adapting to the level of stress we’re experiencing each and every time it beats. However, if you’re absolutely stressed out, sick, or unhealthy, you will have a lower HRV as the heart just pumps extremely steadily, almost like a metronome.

Think of it this way – when you first start out on a ten mile run, you’re feeling good, spry, light on your feet. Your brain and feet are quick to adjust to any changes in the terrain in front of you. By mile 9, however, low on energy and filled with stress hormones, you’re just mechanically slugging along, each foot-stroke identical to the last, just barely pushing yourself forward.

Same thing with the heart. If you’re healthy and in good spirits, your heart adapts to each minute change in your body’s environment. If you’re sick or overly stressed however, your heart just makes sure it keeps a steady pace.

Our HRV in any given moment affects the “feel” or “tone” of our electromagnetic field. But so do emotions.

The HeartMath Institute once again –

We have found there is a direct relationship between the heart-rhythm patterns and the spectral information encoded in the frequency spectra of the magnetic field radiated by the heart. Thus, information about a person’s emotional state is encoded in the heart’s magnetic field and is communicated throughout the body and into the external environment.

Most people tend to think of communication solely in terms of overt signals expressed through facial movements, voice qualities, gestures and body movements. However, evidence now supports the perspective that a subtle yet influential electromagnetic or “energetic” communication system operates just below our conscious level of awareness. The following section will discuss data that suggests this energetic system contributes to the “magnetic” attractions or repulsions that occur between individuals.

What I would like to posit is that other people’s electromagnetically sensitive glial cells can pick up on both the STRENGTH and the HEALTH of our own energy fields. A higher HRV correlates to a “healthier” pranic field. Further, our emotions likely affect resonance (positive emotions) or dissonance (negative emotions) of this field. This is why we seem to “radiate energy”, “glow”, and have magnetic auras.

Increasing the Strength and Health of our Magnetic Aura

Now the body is extremely interesting in that it has two large pumps and multiple “positive” and “negative” energy centers/channels within it.

Our heart is obviously one of the pumps. We can’t increase its strength/output much, but we canincrease the coherence of its EMF by improving our HRV. The second pump within the body is manytimes greater in size than the heart – our diaphragm. Take a deep breath in, and a deep breath out. You might think you used your lungs in order to do this.. But the lungs have no muscle tissue! You were using your diaphragm.

By making sure we take deep, controlled breaths (pranayama), we are able to effectively pump and circulate energy through our electromagnetic field. Yoga postures have the same effect as well – not only do the movements and postures massage endocrine glands and enhance Jing/Ojas, but they clear the energetic channels (nadis) through which the prana flows. The exercises of Qi Gong do the exact same thing.

Yoga, by which I mean the postures, breathing exercises, and meditation, is probably the most effective way to reduce stress and improve HRV! Through yoga and Qi Gong, we can dramatically increase the size, strength, and health of our “auras”.

A 2016 review of 59 studies on yoga concluded –

The ability of yoga to influence autonomic function has been the subject of numerous studies that suggest that yoga practices reduce autonomic arousal and assist with a wide range of stress-related disorders…  Yoga practices, including meditation, relaxation, yoga postures, breathing, and integrated practices, appear to improve autonomic regulation and enhance vagal dominance as reflected by HRV measures

If some of you don’t like yoga, Qi Gong, breathing exercises and meditation, that’s totally fine. You can just practice SR and still reap some of these benefits. Keep stress low, eat clean foods and get plenty of sleep.

If you want to dramatically enhance your aura, keep reading.

Strengthening The Aura

Improving Auric Shine

This can be in tons of ways. Basically, just be healthy and reduce stress levels. Eat clean, nutritious foods, get good sleep, exercise, get sunlight and practice PMA, that positive mental attitude. Most of y’all are already doing this.

If you really wanna increase your personal magnetism, start getting regular with the routine I gave you back in post two. It’s super easy and takes no time at all.

I’ve been into yoga and meditation for a long time now, ten years to be exact. But I haven’t been a daily practitioner for those ten years, and in fact, while I’ve kept up a very healthy lifestyle, the last few years I’ve barely done it all. Shameful, I know.

4 months ago, however, I started making sure to do it regularly. Here are the results on my HRV –

r/Semenretention - Part 3 - Strengthening Your Aura and Personal Magnetism

That’s huge!

So keep up the asanas, and feel free to add more if you like.

Positive, Negative and Neutral Nadis

There are 3 main nadis, or energy channels through which prana flows through (and a 4th one that we will be harnessing later specifically for sublimation purposes). Those three main nadis are sushumna, ida and pingala.

r/Semenretention - Part 3 - Strengthening Your Aura and Personal Magnetism

Going into detail of each nadi is enough information to write a book about, so for now I will just say that ida is negatively charged, pingala positively charged, and sushumna is neutral. Ida is sometimes referred to as the chandra, meaning moon, and pingala as surya nadi, the sun channel.

Breathing through the left nostril moves prana through ida, breathing through the right moves prana through pingala. Now, Sushumna is generally closed off in most people. One of the goals in yoga, and specifically in nadi shodhana and spinal breathing pranayamas, is to clear out and awaken this nadi. In fact, if you want sublimation of sexual energy to be most effective, this nadi is key – this is how the sexual energy flows upward.

Positively and Negatively Charged Energy Centers

Within the yogic map of the energy body there are both channels and energy centers. These centers are referred to as chakras, and the 7 main ones are shown in the photo above. Each correlate to certain powers and faculties of mind, psychological concepts, endocrine glands, etc.

Right now we are only interested in two – Mooladhara and Ajna chakras. Mooladhara is often thought of as the chakra at the base of the spine, but it is in fact in the perineum, and is the seat of ida, pingalaand sushumna nadis. Ajna chakra is at the top of the spinal cord and is the last chakra that ida and pingala pierce, before flowing out of the nostrils. Sushumna goes beyond Ajna to the chakra at the crown of the head.

As you can probably guess by now, sublimation is all about moving the sexual energy from the lower chakras up to the higher chakras! More energy to the solar plexus chakra and you increase your personal power. Sublimate to the heart chakra and you have increased capacity for love, compassion, goodwill and you generally feel amazing. More energy to the throat chakra, you become gifted in speech. To Ajna, the third eye, you become an intellectual dynamo, mental faculties are increased 100-fold, and you may even begin to have many Jungian synchronicities and borderline psychic events occuring. If you gentlemen are interested in how to do this, it can be a topic of a later post.

You guys ever seen one of those flashlights that you have to shake in order to make it work? Inside the handle is a tube of magnetic coil and a big magnet that moves back and forth when you shake it, creating electricity. This is the same thing that happens at the pranic level when we practice alternate nostril breathing and spinal breathing, and this generates more and more energy for our aura. We move prana between negatively and positively charged chakras and nadis.

With alternate nostril breathing, we breath in first through the negative channel, and then out of the positively charged channel. Then in through positive, out through negative.

With the spinal breathing practice, we inhale energy from Mooladhara chakra up to Ajna, connecting the two oppositely charged poles. We increase the wattage of our pranic field.

Practices – Bhastrika, Nadi Shodhana, Spinal Breathing, Ujjayi, Kegels, and Metta meditation

Keep the same simple asana routine as explained in post 2. Then move on to the breathing exercises and meditation. Remember, empty stomach for these things.

Bhastrika – This word translates to “bellows”, and as such is also called the bellows breath. It’s essentially controlled hyperventilation. Just as a bellows fans the flames of a fire, bhastrika pranayamafans your pranic field. It’s classified as an energizing pranayama, so this is a great one to practice any time you need to clear the mental cobwebs.

This pranayama is working to quickly increase the strength, size and shine of your pranic field, of your aura.

It’s incredibly simple as well. Sit down in any comfortable position that keeps the spine straight. Inhale and exhale quickly and somewhat forcefully thirty times, using the belly, not the chest, to breathe in and out. At the end of thirty breaths, exhale completely, squeezing all the air out of the lungs, and then inhale slowly and evenly to about 85% capacity, and hold for 5-10 seconds. This is one round. Complete 1-3 rounds before moving on to the other pranayamas and meditation.

For nadi shodhana, the alternate nostril breathing, start increasing the amount of time on the exhale. The goal is to have the exhale be twice as long as the inhale. So if you inhale through the left for a count of 4, you’d exhale through the right for a count of 8, and reverse the process.

Don’t rush or force anything – we don’t force anything at all with these practices. If 4:6 is comfortable, stick with that and aim for 4:7 in a couple weeks, and then 4:8 in a few more weeks. You might be doing 3:6, or even 5:10. Doesn’t matter the length of time, just practice the ratios and keep increasing when possible.

For spinal breathing, we’re going to add a new technique called ujjayi pranayama. Ujjayi means “to be victorious”. It’s one of the most powerful pranayamas within yoga, but also one of the easiest. You simply contract the glottis within the throat, making a very faint, almost snoring sound. It may also sound somewhat like the ocean.

So for each inhale and exhale, contract the glottis, and move your awareness up and down that thin thread within your spine.

This contraction acts creates a pranic suction, helping to transmit that sexual energy you’ve been building up towards the brain. This is the magnet moving back in forth in the flashlight handle! It also has a ton of benefits of its own, not related to sublimation.

Don’t be fooled by how simple this practice is. Many of the higher sublimation techniques are absolutely dependent upon it, so it would be wise to practice spinal breathing with ujjayi every day. And remember, if you try the higher techniques without mastering the lower ones, that sexual energy won’t be able to make it up to the brain.

Kegels – start practicing these. If you don’t know what they are, google it. It helps retain that sexual energy, sublimates it upwards, is a crucial practice if you ever want to learn tantric sex, and is used in the more advanced sublimation techniques. These can be done at literally any time.

Magnetizing the Aura

Everything up until this point has been about cleansing and strengthening your bioelectrical field. But what about making it truly magnetic?

Well, this goes back to the Taoist idea of the Three Treasures – Jing, Qi and Shen. In Ayurveda, Ojas, Prana and Tejas. Increasing the size and strength of our Aura, that falls under the domain of Qi/Prana. And doing this alone does create some magnetism, there is no doubt whatsoever about it. But to make it truly magnetic, you want to increase your Shen/Tejas. This goes far beyond the scope of this post, but I’ll leave you with a real powerful technique to get you started.

Metta meditation

Some of you may have heard of this meditation. It’s also called loving-kindness meditation. It’s just sending good vibes to people, including yourself, but it has powerful repercussions.

Have you ever met someone and just gotten bad vibes from them? And I don’t mean some creepy dude on the street or at a party. I’ve met more than a handful of people who I just didn’t like, even though they were usually attractive, smart, funny, and other people seemed drawn to them. Later we all found out they were actually terrible people.

My take is that they were naturally charismatic and had a strong pranic field, abundant Jing and Qi. But because they didn’t have good intentions, a small percentage of people sensitive enough were able to pick up on this.

Or you may be familiar with the opposite, meeting someone that you’re just absolutely drawn to, but can’t figure out why. They got that magnetic aura, son!

A practice like metta meditation really helps to shine up those vibes you’re putting out there, and really make ’em magnetic. Add metta meditation after your breathing practices. It can also be done before bed, upon waking or any time you need a mood boost. Here’s how it’s done.

Metta

  1. You begin by sitting down, closing your eyes, and wishing happiness upon yourself. This is crucial. A lot, and I mean a lot, of people don’t like themselves. If that’s your modus operandi, if that’s your default settings, then THAT’S what you’re projecting out there onto the world. So begin by wishing yourself happiness.
  2. Plant a small smile on your face and picture yourself smiling and truly happy and content. Some people like to repeat phrases, such as “May I have peace and happiness, and be filled with joy.” Some are more visual and imagine sending healing light towards themselves. No matter what you do, make sure you really try to mean it, and to genuinely feel the feeling of wishing yourself well.
  3. Sit with those feelings, the image of yourself smiling and truly happy, and repeat those phrases for 15-20 seconds.
  4. Next, picture the person you already love the most, smiling, carefree, content, and repeat the process for them. For me, this is my niece or nephew. Generate those feelings toward whoever this second person is, and realllly try to seep and saturate yourself with the feeling of wishing them the absolute best out of life.
  5. Choose another person as your object of meditation and repeat the process, picturing them happy as can be, sending good vibes to them and wishing them happiness.
  6. After five minutes or so, wish everyone in the world happiness and peace.

Now some of us aren’t very in touch with our emotions. I legitimately think I’m a robot sometimes, watching people seesaw from one extreme emotion to the next, wondering if I ever experience real emotions myself. If you don’t feel much your first time, that’s ok. Just keep at it.

If you have real bad issues with loving yourself, start with the person you love most. Generate as strong of feelings as possible for them, and then switch to yourself and try to let those feelings carry over.

I guarantee that with some practice, this will begin to generate strong feelings of wellbeing for yourself and others. It’s absolutely one of the best feelings of my day, and that happiness carries over to when I’m not in seated meditation. It’s like training your mind to be happy, and to have happiness on command.

Again, those good feelings get encoded in your energy field, in your aura. Other people pick up on these vibes, and they’re good vibrations in your bioelectric field.

Plus, if you wanna talk Heart Rate Variability, this is what happened during one of my metta meditations – it damn-near TRIPLED my HRV.

r/Semenretention - Part 3 - Strengthening Your Aura and Personal Magnetism

Again, a higher HRV means higher heart/body synchronization, and a more coherent electromagnetic/pranic field that you’re emitting. That means you’re radiating health and coherence, and that is magnetic.

Till next time friends.

Recommended Reading –

The Biology of Transcendence

Prana and Pranayama

Be Here Now

Posted on

Part 2 – Cultivation and Sublimation Basics

This was my second post on the Reddit sub for Semen Retention.

Part 1 here..

To recap, that charge of confidence, that sexual energy that just makes the whole world juicy when you practice Semen Retention.. The Taoist Qi Gong practitioners call that energy Jing. Yogis know it as Ojas.It’s that energy that makes you feel alive and confident, that lets you burn the candle at both ends as a teenager, letting you masturbate and have sex to your little hearts content, party hard all night and then get up and do it again in the morning.

It’s that good good.

Let’s learn how to cultivate even more of it and transmute it, turning us ordinary Joes into the Ubermensch..

Remember that the following terms are interchangeable and I will be bouncing back and forth between them – Jing/Ojas, Qi/Prana, and Shen/Tejas.Some conceptual frameworks to work with

The leaky cup

The first framework we went over in Post 1, that of a cup with holes or leaks in it. We are that cup, and our goal is to fill it up with that sweet, sweet Jing nectar. The way we go about doing this is by avoiding things that create leaks while at the same time*, doing things to further increase Jing/Ojas.*

The biggest leak in our cup comes from squandering our seed – this must be retained and then sublimated. There are many other lesser ways we dissipate our Jing, but these smaller acts do add up, so we should be mindful.

At the same time we go about plugging up these leaks, we do things to actively increase our Jing as well. The big hitters in this field include using the techniques handed down within Taoist Qi Gong and Tantric Yoga – breathing exercises, visualizations, bodily postures, movements and gestures, as well as herbal therapies and sexual practices. These all radically increase our Jing and enhance our Semen Retention practice. This stuff is like adding jet fuel to your Semen Retention fire. The practices ahead amplify that drive, confidence, brain power and magnetism many, many times over.

The mind/body as energetic system

I’m sure most of you are familiar the image below, that of chakras and nadis, the vortices and channels through which Prana/Qi flow. The map below is the one most commonly used within Hatha and Tantra yoga, and the Taoists have a similar map.

The names, functions and significance of the chakras and nadis are not important at this stage. In fact, whether you believe in them at all isn’t important either.

What’s important for us right now is to start thinking of the body as a kind of battery, an energetic system. What we’re going to be doing as we cultivate Jing is to increase the energy within this system. As Jing increases, Qi/Prana does as well. This is why you suddenly have so much energy and drive to get things done after retaining for awhile! This energy can be further sublimated into Shen/Tejas, that cognitive/spiritual power and radiance some people seem to exude. Anyone who has experienced that charismatic magnetism knows just what I’m talking about.

A very important point I forgot to mention in the previous post is that while building Jing increases Qi, which then increases Shen, we can also work from top down and in any order we want. Conserving Shen can increase Qi and Jing, and increasing Qi can be sublimated either into Shen or condensed back down into Jing. Qi/Prana is the easiest to work with, so this energy system is key. This is one of the key things I haven’t really seen mentioned on this sub much.

Viewing the body as energetic system is HUGELY important for three reasons – one, we will be using visualization practices for sublimation based off of these energetic maps.

Two, think of a wire that conducts electricity. If it isn’t clean, if it’s rusted, if it’s covered in gunk and grime, will it be able to conduct electricity? Poorly, if at all. In fact just back in May I had to clean off the terminals of my car battery because they were corroded and my car kept dying. Impurities impede conductivity.

Finally, and most importantly, we have to be careful so as to not blow a fuse in the circuit. Imagine what happens when water starts flowing through a hose, but halfway through the water hits a kink. All that pressure builds and builds, at best preventing the flow of water, at worst causing an explosion somewhere along the line.

Whether you believe in chakras or not, you’re surely aware that you have a nervous system, and that this system is very sensitive. Electromagnetic energy (Prana/Qi) travels along this highway of nerves. You also have an endocrine system, which produces all of the hormones (Jing) in your body. The fact that EMF can disrupt the pineal gland’s production of melatonin should tell you just how sensitive this system is.

Yoga and Qi Gong, amongst other things, strengthen and balance the nervous and endocrine systems.Those systems all happen to line up almost perfectly with the chakras and nadis show above.

“If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.” – Nikola Tesla

“My brain is only a receiver, in the Universe there is a core from which we obtain knowledge, strength and inspiration. I have not penetrated into the secrets of this core, but I know that it exists.” – Nikola Tesla

Basics of Jing Cultivation

Alright guys, I’ve already written quite a bit, so let’s jump to some practical advice. Nothing in this next section is going to be mind blowing, but it’s essential you start chipping away at this stuff now. Remember, you’ve already plugged the biggest leak, and keeping that leak plugged is huge! Later on we’ll discuss learning to orgasm without ejaculation and how you can begin to permit occasional ejaculation, if you so desire.

How Jing is Commonly Wasted

  • Poor Diet
  • Lack of sleep/Poor quality sleep
  • Abuse of drugs, particularly stimulants (including ADHD meds), opiates, binge drinking and smoking cigarettes, etc – These all cause your body to release and burn through hormones and neurotransmitters (Jing), and affect the nervous system (Qi). Even coffee and caffeine cause your body to burn through dopamine, norepinephrine, cortisol and more. The key here is to just not abuse any of these things! Moderation, my friends, and if you are prescribed medications, be smart and don’t just stop taking them!
  • Excessive ruminating, anxiety, depression… in a word, poor mental hygiene
  • Excessive exertion – Running multiple marathons a year, working out hard every single day, “burning the candle at both ends”, too much cerebral work and not enough “embodied” work (or the reverse)
  • Excessive fasting
  • Erratic mood swings/intense emotions – just have balanced emotions. Think of every embarrassment, failure, and setback you’ve ever faced. Guess what? You’re absolutely fine right now, in this moment. It’s not worth the excessive worry, embarrassment and anger you felt. Think of every toy you ever obsessed over and begged for for Christmas. When you got it, you were elated! And now, you’ve likely thrown it out or it’s collecting dust.
  • Hedonism – This is gonna be a biggie for us in this age, and this is a constant battle. Hedonism refers to the fact that we live in a MASSIVELY overstimulating world and it’s waaay too easy to overindulge. Our food is literally engineered to be addictively tasty while having almost no nutrition. Everywhere we look there is another screen with flashing lights and pretty colors vying for attention, and apps based off of intermittent reinforcement that suck us back in. We are the mouse in the cage constantly pressing the lever, desperately hoping for that next “hit”. Read, reread and read again u/freeanonsoul‘s post The Spirit of Seeing. This is where NoFap stems from, this is where “dopamine fasting” stems from. This is the true meaning of Brahmacharya, it is not just celibacy but control of the mind and senses!! More on this later.

“A true saying it is, Desire hath no rest, is infinite in itself, endless, and as one calls it, a perpetual rack, or horse-mill.” – Robert Burton

“I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.” – Henry David Thoreau

“A really efficient totalitarian state would be one in which the all-powerful executive of political bosses and their army of managers control a population of slaves who do not have to be coerced, because they love their servitude.” – Aldous Huxley

How Jing can be Easily Cultivated

  • Proper rest – Practice good sleep hygiene! If there are any podcast junkies out there, check out Matthew Walker on JRE. This is THE biggest way to maintain Jing outside of SR.
  • Proper nutrition ~ Nutrient density – It’s pretty simple guys – Jing is the strength and integrity of allllll our hormones, neurotransmitters, immune system, cellular structure, and even DNA. All of this is built out of nutrients we get from our diet! The topic of nutrition alone would take many posts for us, so for now, try to make sure your diet is based off of whole foods, get adequate protein, healthy fat sources (get Omega 3’s, avoid fried foods, vegetable and seed oils), eat plenty of green veggies and berries (or use green powders to start), organic is preferable but not necessary, and use a quality multivitamin and quality fish oil.
  • Proper nutrition ~ Detoxification – Before you lump me in with all the MLM people you see on your facebook pedaling detox products, understand what I mean. “Detoxing” is a fad, a gimmick, and a way to make money off of gullible people who expect quick fixes without putting in the work. That ain’t us. However, the body absolutely and 100% actively detoxifies itself all day, every day. We need to make sure we are helping it to do so, firstly because it is a huuuge drain on energy levels to be constantly detoxifying surplus chemicals (especially the xenoestrogens that are dragging out testosterone levels down), waste products and end products of basic metabolism. Detoxification also helps us become more sensitive to Prana/Qi, which is absolutely going to come in handy when we start doing Pranayama and visualizations. Finally, and this is a biggie, when it comes to one of the most powerful ways to build the Three Treasures, through herbs, you’ll get very little to no effect from them if your body isn’t able to properly utilize and assimilate them. It’s also extremely easy to do – eat a lot more greens, practice intermittent fasting (I personally do at least 8:16 most days), and make sure you’re eating mostly fresh whole foods and not packaged junk. Daniel Reid talks a lot about this in his book, and within Hatha Yoga they begin with the Shatkarmas, or Six Actions, to hasten the cleansing process.
  • Proper exercise – nothing new here. Lifting weights help optimize male hormone levels andhelps us in the beginning to manage some of that excess energy/horniness/positive aggressiveness. Cardio helps us build up a sweat and eliminate toxins both through sweating and breathing – yes, toxins are eliminated through the lungs, that’s how breathalyzers work. Exercising 3-5 times a week is a great goal.
  • Positive Mental Attitude/Compassion/Generosity – Real men, and people coming from places of real power, are almost always givers. They come from a place of surplus, and they want to share that with those around them. There’s a reason the first two of the the 8 limbs of Raja Yoga are based on ethics, why Jesus preached to love thy neighbor, and why the Buddhists are so focused on generosity, compassion, right speech and right living. Generosity, compassion and love are a never-ending source of energy and strength. What you give, you receive back ten-fold, and I feel like most of us on this sub know this. Bunch of helpful and positive fuckers.

Practice Stage 1 – Asana and Pranayama

On to the good stuff! This post is just going to cover some basics, but remember, this is the foundation upon which your castle is built! The goal is to build a strong and supple nervous system that is able to handle higher and higher amounts of Pranic energy.

It is better to practice a small amount every day than it is to do longer sessions every once in a while! Pay attention to how you feel before and after the practice, and to how you feel in your everyday life as time goes on.

Asana

The word asana just means posture. These different postures serve three immediate functions for us – they strengthen and purify the nerves/nadis for higher Pranic loads, they prepare us to sit comfortably when we do Pranayama/meditation, AND they enhance Jing.

Jing is largely about our hormones, remember? Hormones are produced by endocrine glands, and asanas squeeze, massage and tone these glands, enhancing blood-flow to them and their secretion of precious Jing hormones. Chakras line up almost perfectly with all your major endocrine glands.. Hmm..

I’m going to give the most basic set of asanas. This is the backbone I personally use, and if I’m tight on time, this is it verbatim. I’m not trying to sneakily convert a bunch of dudes on Reddit into becoming soccer moms, so we’re going to keep things batshit simple. It includes a dynamic sequence, a forward bend, some back bends, a spinal twist and an inverted posture – other than the fact it’s missing shavasana, that’s a complete asana practice!

Asanas feel pretty damn good and are a transformative practice. Remember, asanas improve endocrine function and therefor directly increase Jing! Feel free to learn more than what I teach here. Hell, take that Big Dick energy to the local yoga club and meet yourself some honey bunnies.

Practice –

  • 2 full rounds of surya namaskara – sun salutations. Note that 1 full round is really two half-rounds – the first half you take your right foot back first, the second half you take your left foot back, and that completes one round
  • 1-2 minutes half-paschimottanasana – this is literally the one-legged sit-and-reach we did in gym class growing up. 30-60 seconds to the right side first, then with the left leg
  • 30 seconds dhanurasana – bow pose
  • 30 seconds bhujangasana – cobra pose. I like to look over my right shoulder, hold for a few seconds, go down to starting position, then arch the back up again and look over the left shoulder for a few seconds. This gives an enhanced massage to the kidneys and adrenals, which as you’ll learn later, are the “seat of Jing”.
  • 60 seconds ardha matsyendrasana – 30 seconds to the right, 30 to the left
  • 15-30 seconds salamba sarvangasana – shoulder stand. This practice will be crucial for more advanced sublimation!

Time ~ 10-12 minutes

Notes ~ Practice on an empty stomach. Two hours after a meal or half hour prior to a meal. First thing in the morning is great, although you will be noticeably stiffer than if you practiced later in the day, and I don’t meant morning wood. Go straight from asanas into pranayama.

Pranayama

This is the active cultivation and manipulation of Prana, or Qi. In Qi Gong, Yi (the mind), directs Qi. Qi directs Jing. Therefor, by combining the mind (awareness) with the breath, we are able to sublimate our Jing.

The benefits are tremendous, but for us right now, it includes not just increasing our Prana at any given moment, and thus energy, but also sublimating Jing into Qi into Shen. When we increase our Prana during practice it can then be used to enhance meditation (Qi->Shen), or can then be “stored” as Jing.

Each time you sit to do pranayama, you are actively sublimating your Jing!

We can also use pranayama for daily life. Need to boost your energy before you lift a heavy weight? There are multiple pranayamas for that. Need to calm down before a job interview? Got you covered. Need help sleeping? Easy peasy. Need to boost your immune system and warm the body in preparation for an ice plunge? Check out ya boy Wim Hof.

Do one of the following for 5-10 minutes after asanas, preferably alternating which practice you do each session –

  • Nadi Shodhana – This is alternating the breath through the left and right nostrils. Shodhanameans to purify, so this practice is all about purifying your nadis, the channels through which Prana flows. In Taoism, these are called meridians. If you could only do one pranayama for the rest of your life, this would be the one, and while it seems simple, it has IMMENSE benefits
  1. Sit in lotus, half-lotus, cross-legged, whatever is comfortable and keeps your spine straight.
  2. Curl you pointer and middle finger into the palm of your right hand, so that only your thumb, ring and pinky fingers are still extended
  3. Exhale
  4. Close the right nostril with the thumb, and inhale a full but gentle breath through the left nostril
  5. Close the left nostril and exhale through the right
  6. Keeping left nostril closed, inhale again through the right
  7. Close the right nostril, and exhale through the left
  8. If you’d like to add a visual component, imagine inhaling white light through the left nostril down the left side of the spine to the base, and then exhaling it back up the right side of the spine and out through the right nostril. Reverse the visualization for the next breath
  • Spinal Breathing – this is a concept used in Taoism, Tantra and Yoga. This is a powerful practice for cultivating the Three Treasures, so get real familiar with it.
  1. Sit in lotus, half-lotus, cross-legged, whatever is comfortable and keeps your spine straight
  2. Close your eyes and exhale
  3. Inhale slowly and evenly, filling your lower belly first, then mid abdomen, and finally the lungs around your clavicle
  4. Exhale slowly and evenly, reversing the order
  5. Inhale again, except this time move your awareness up a very thin channel or thread that starts at the perineum, moves up the center of the spinal cord, up through the brainstem and into the exact center of the head
  6. Repeat the process but in reverse, drawing the the awareness from the center of the brain (Ajna chakra) back down through the center of the spinal cord, and to the perineum at the base of the spine (Mooladhara chakra). Repeat this visualization with each inhale and exhale

For right now, your breathing practice will also be your meditation practice, as it requires a calm, concentrated mind to do the visualizations.

Notes ~ Again, empty stomach is preferred. You may feel tingling or other pleasurable sensations, these are a sign of progress and will only greatly increase with practice.

If you have really congested airways, look into neti pots or a vapor inhaler.

Key Takeaways

  • Start thinking of yourself as a leaky cup and as an energetic being
  • Get good sleep, eat well and cleanly, reduce stress, start cutting back on partying, don’t do anything to excess
  • Start exercising if you haven’t already, and try to do more good in the world
  • Asanas enhance Jing and allow for easy sublimation
  • Pranayama is a simple but powerful practice, and the quickest and most powerful way to sublimate Jing

Recommended reading ~ Practice

The Tao of Health, Sex and Longevity

Asana Pranayama Mudra Bandha

Recommended reading ~ Mindset

The Spirit of Seeing

Invictus

Walden

Song of Myself

Island

Recommended Listening

Sinatra’s My Way

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Yoga and Semen Retention

I wanted to give a little bit of background on why I focus so much on yoga and Eastern practices in general, as well as a bit of a background on them themselves. For those with no interest in the topic whatsoever, this post still has valuable conceptual information for all on the retention journey.

Why I Talk So Much About Yoga

Some of y’all might be wondering why I talk so much about yoga, about Taoist practices and Eastern thought in general. Not only is it foreign for those of us in the West, with odd words and concepts, but the concept of yoga itself is very feminine here. Say “yoga” and it immediately conjures up images of soccer moms, pumpkin spice lattes in hand, wearing yoga pants and thinking they’re getting a real workout. I get it! That’s what I thought too before I really learned about it. Google “sadhu” or, crazier yet, “sadhu aghori” if you’d like to see how some yogis actually look.

Aghori Sadhus

Here’s what yoga actually is though – it is a spiritual science for achieving mystical experiences. Yoga comes from the Sanskrit root “yuj”, which means “to yoke”, “to merge” or “to unite”. It’s the science of merging the “little i” with the “big I”, of the ego with the highest level of consciousness, of the self with the Ground of All Being. Yoga was created and perfected over thousands of years for one purpose and one purpose only – to help the practitioner achieve mystical experiences and eventual enlightenment. 

Yoga isn’t religious. While it did come about in ancient India, it is not a Hindu, Buddhist nor Jain practice, and it in fact predates these religions. It is a standalone practice. Just as Christians pray, but prayer isn’t only for Christians, yoga developed in India, but it is for everyone.

The postures you see in yoga, the asanas, are only the tip of the iceberg within yoga. Within one form of yoga, Ashtanga yoga, they are just one of eight limbs, and, amongst other things, are used to prepare the practitioner for deeper states of meditation. We in the West have commoditized yoga, prepackaged it with lotus flowers and pastel-colored yoga pants, and sold it to bored women who were looking for a way to exercise without really breaking a sweat. That’s what we do here in the West – bastardize things for monetary gain. 

True yoga is, in actuality, arguably the most hardcore thing you can do in this life – to overcome your limited ego and peel back the veil of reality, to see what is actually going on behind the curtain. 

Now, that isn’t our goal in this sub – this sub is about hacking and utilizing one of the most powerful forces available to us – our sexual energy – via the retention of semen, in order to accelerate our successes in life. 

Well guess what? Yogis have known about this for millennia and have perfected all sorts of techniques and methods to not only retain semen, even during sex, but to harness, amplify and transform this energy into rocket fuel for spiritual evolution. Why do you think celibacy is required of monks and nuns of almost all spiritual traditions? Conserving this energy is a powerful tool for self-transformation.

Some of you may have heard about this in the form of Brahmacharya, literally “God-like conduct” or “conduct leading to God”, but which is often translated as mere celibacy. But again, that is just the tip of the iceberg. The more powerful and esoteric practices within yoga must either be learned from a guru, a teacher, or from the right resources, which are few and far between.

Here’s the important thing to ask yourself – why do we experience benefits from semen retention? The benefits aren’t just having great, big balls full of sperm, as fun as that is. There’s little to no benefit from the sperm and semen itself. We experience benefits because we’re beginning to hack our nervous and endocrine systems, as well as our mental programming.

Let me reiterate that point – all the benefits of semen retention stem from beginning to hack our nervous, endocrine and mental systems! Put a big fuckin’ star next to that point in your mind.

Retention starts a positive cascade of hormonal changes, beginning with reversing the rise in prolactin and drop in dopamine caused by ejaculatory orgasm. It begins to build energy (prana/Qi) within the nervous system, increasing the size and strength of your aura. And retention is obviously, first and foremost, a mental discipline, which only increases your mental fortitude in all aspects of life, as you’ve slain possibly the biggest dragon there is – sexual desire. (As an aside, ever wonder why there are so many depictions of slaying/conquering dragons or serpents, both in the East and in Western alchemical depictions? It symbolizes man overcoming the reptilian part of his brain, which is in charge of our primal urges, the most insidious of which is the urge to procreate.)

Yoga is nothing but a systematic and scientific method of further hacking all of these systems. It powerfully improves endocrine functioning (hormones) through all the postures squeezing and massaging the endocrine glands; pranayama is the direct increasing and manipulation of prana/Qi/bioelectrical energy within and around the nervous system; and meditation is the practice of training and strengthening the mind. Never mind all of the advanced mudras, bandhas and kriyas used that many never hear about. 

All of that said, these sorts of practices are not limited to yoga, and may exist in some form in other spiritual sciences as well. Every religion has their mystical traditions – Kabbalah within Judaism, Gnosticism within Christianity, Sufism within Islam, and the many yogic and tantric practices within Hinduism, Buddhism and Taoism. They likely all have some form of sexual sublimation practices. 

I speak specifically so much about yoga in particular for a couple of reasons, but the main one is that it has the most information available and it is extremely detailed and thorough. It is very much alive and still being practiced for its true purpose the world over, especially in the East. 

Taoist practices come a very close second – there’s almost as much info available, and the info available is complementary to what I’ve learned from yoga. There’s much more info about tantric sex and the use of herbs coming from Taoism/Traditional Chinese Medicine than from yoga/Ayurveda, but in my eyes, yoga has much more detailed maps and techniques for “solo cultivation” of sexual energy. So I choose to blend the two, and trust me – it is incredibly powerful.

The final reason I focus so much on yogic practices within this community is this – these techniques simply blow anything else clean out of the water. Cold showers, working out, goal-setting and accomplishing, all of these things are FANTASTIC practices for us on the path of retention. And in fact, they should come first and foremost, before trying any of this more advanced wizardry. There’s no point trying to amplify and circulate this sexual energy you’re building up if you aren’t taking care of the foundational sublimation techniques, of taking basic care of your body, of journaling and self-reflection, of setting goals and actually sticking to them. 

There are so many guys out there that are experts in these things and are doing the good work of sharing their advice with others. These guys are killing it with advice on these topics, and I think they are just as, if not more valuable due to their foundational nature, as all these yogic things I talk about. I saw there was little in the way of these powerful energy practices in the community, and these practices which have been a fascination of mine for years, so that has been my focus. 

I’m not trying to convince anyone to become yogis or Taoists, and certainly not trying to change anyone’s religion. You can practice semen retention without ever hearing the word “yoga”. These are simply powerful internal practices that, if done correctly and regularly, will take semen retention to insane heights, and have the potential to radically transform the quality of your life.

“Absorb what is useful, reject what is useless, add what is essentially your own.” – Bruce Lee

Posts in the Pipeline –

Advanced Sublimation Techniques

Building Sexual Energy w/ Herbs pt. 2

Intro to Tantra

Recommended Reading

The Perennial Philosophy by Aldous Huxley

Asana Pranayama Mudra Bandha by Swami Satyananda Saraswati

The Book: On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are by Alan Watts

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The Ten Semen Retention Commandments

This was a post meant for Reddit, but it kept getting banned for some reason. A user was curious so here it is – enjoy.

These are just ten guidelines I keep in mind when it comes to SR. Yours may differ, and these might even change for me as time goes on.

The Ten Commandments of Semen Retention

  1. Thou shalt preserve thy seed and retain this sacred energy
  2. Thou shalt increase, nourish and protect this energy
  3. Sublimate and invest this energy in the betterment of thyself
  4. Thou shalt strengthen and develop the physical body
  5. Thou shalt strengthen and develop the mind – meditate
  6. Free thyself from the shackles of comfort, distraction and sensual lust, meeting fear head on and seeking beneficial discomfort
  7. Thou shalt develop and grow the heart
  8. Thou shalt actively help others – a rising tide lifts all ships
  9. Separate from Woman, that one may learn what it is to be Man
  10. Return, and embrace and respect Woman as equal

1. Preserve thy seed – This one needs no explanation. It’s the essential first step. Abstain from masturbation, and if having sex, try not to release. That second part is tricky, but can be done.

2. Increase, nourish, protect this sacred energy – That sexual energy can still be squandered though, throwing it away to social media, excessive gaming, drugs/partying, etc. Many people stop at simply not masturbating. They’ve plugged the leak – what else is there to do? Unfortunately, they fail to realize all the ways in which this energy can be further enhanced. They also don’t realize how easy it is to waste this energy in sensual distractions. The rubber meets the road when you learn to not just prevent its leaking, but to increase this sexual energy as well.

3. Sublimate and invest this energy back into yourself – Conserving sexual energy means a sudden increase in willpower, and a drive to get things done. What are you going to do with all this new energy? Now’s the time to set up healthy habits and routines to invest this energy and newfound badass-ness in. Read uplifting texts; start working out; start that business you always kept on the back-burner; ask out that girl you’ve been crushing on; pick that guitar back up; figure out your goals, write em out, and start chipping away. Investing this energy back into yourself increases it ten-fold – don’t squander it on meaningless pursuits. It also keeps your motivation high – look at all this stuff you’ve accomplished after you started retaining. Part 2 went over some sublimation insights.

4. Strengthen the body – I highly recommend you guys look into lifting weights – it will help rebalance hormone levels, i.e. increase testosterone, DHT and HGH. Hill sprints are great in this department as well, and you’ll get a huge confidence boost once you see your body starting to develop. It’s also a great way to practice discomfort. Whatever you do, stay healthy through diet, exercise of some sort, stress reduction and good sleep hygiene. If you’re massively overweight, sickly, or up all night getting high and gaming, you really think cutting out porn and masturbation is gonna improve your life much?

5. Strengthen and develop the mind – The mind is the tool through which you interact with the entire world around you, and through which you interact with yourself. IT IS THE GATEKEEPER! In my eyes, this is the most important commandment. You don’t want to be at the mercy of the world, because the world is unpredictable. It’s unreliable. At the same time, you don’t want to be at the mercy of your internal world, of your cravings, desires, attachments, fears, and emotions. A strong, well-developed mind is unruffled by both exterior events and internal states – it is like a huge battleship, able to weather any turbulent storm, and wait it out till the seas settle. The mind is key – see Part 5.

6. Overcome your attachment to comfort and sensual distraction, and embrace fear and discomfort – Part 4 went into detail on this. Your fear and attachment to comfort keep you stuck at your current level. You must confront both to start progressing. “We don’t rise to level of our expectations, we fall to the level of our training” – Archilochus. You’ll never reach your goals if you keep doing the same comfortable, safe shit you’ve always done. And when shit hits the fan, if you’re weak in heart and mind, you’ll get scared, you’ll falter, and you’ll shrink from the uncomfortable. Time to shake things up, challenge and scare yourself, and nut up!

7. Develop the Heart – At a bare minimum, practice compassion, patience, generosity and forgiveness. Start developing these things towards yourself first, then others. Think of your heart and mind as a movie projector. Thoughts and feelings pop up, and these get projected outward. This is why some people have good vibes, and some people bad vibes – you’re just picking up on their thoughts and feelings. When you start retaining, you start projecting those thoughts and feelings out there BIG TIME. Your little movie projector has turned into a spotlight/Bat signal situation – your vibes become strong as hell, and right as rain, people will notice. You don’t want negative thoughts and feelings muddying up your Shen/pranic field/aura, so as we develop the mind, we simultaneously develop the heart and emotions. Part 3 goes into detail on this.

8. Help others, a rising tide lifts all ships – What do you think of when you think of a real man? Big, buff, burly and strong? Rich and charming? Athletic prowess? I think of my father, my grandfather, and my stepfather. Each are very successful by every metric of the word, but most importantly, these are men that come from a place of abundance, and are quick to help those around them. In my eyes, a willingness to help others comes from a place of strength and abundance. Think of the alpha male in a tribe – sure, they get all the credit as the toughest guy in the group, but they also provide for the rest of the group. They look after the others, and they make sure they’re taken care of and protected. You’ve discovered this great gift of retention – it’s now your responsibility to help others less fortunate. Generosity is a gift that gives back, and a gift that you can never run out of. People are more willing to help you when you’ve already helped them. It’s called the rule of reciprocity.

9. Separate from the Feminine for a period of time – Why do you think rites of passage are common among all indigenous peoples? Both the men and women have their own versions. For men, it usually involves separating from the women for a period of time, during which they complete arduous tasks and hardships, even usually a symbolic death and rebirth. The child dies and is reborn a man. Semen retention is a step in this direction. But you can’t reap the benefits of semen retention by simply not ejaculating – if you’re still obsessed with women, well, this practice won’t fully blossom. I strongly advise to start a period of deep self-discovery and self-development when you start retaining. I’m not saying dump your lady, I’m not saying avoid all females like the plague, and I’m absolutely not saying look down on them or disrespect them. I’m just saying don’t obsess over them. A bit of selfishness is healthy right now. It’s likely not feasible for you to split from society and go hunting wild boar with the boys for the summer, but just focus on yourself. David Deida talks a lot about this.

10. Return to and embrace the Feminine – This is the last step in the process, but guess what? It’s come full circle, the process has been completed. But like the alchemists that we are, we no longer are dealing with women from a place of craving or want – we are now complete, whole, and able to appreciate the feminine as our equal and our complement. It’s very important to cultivate the feminine energy within as well, and as counterintuitive as it sounds, it will make you into more of a man. But that’s a topic for a whole other time.

What would some of your commandments be?

My challenge to you brethren – create a modern version of a rites of passage. This could be a weekend solo camping trip, with no cell phone and no distractions, where you contemplate your place in this world. It could be 3-5 day fast – work up to this one if you’re inexperienced. It could be a meditation retreat. For the psychonauts, it could be a heroic dose. You could go all out and do a 3 day contemplative fast/vision quest out in the woods culminating in a psychedelic experience!

Whatever you do, make sure it contains three elements – it is done with intentionality, that some part of you symbolically dies, and that you are reborn and reintegrated into the modern world.